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28 August 2017 @ 09:20 am
Okay. I have followed these forums for years, but never posted anything. I tried a menstrual cup for the first time when I was 13 or 14 (Diva Cup) and I couldn't get it out, so I was scared, and didn't come back to it for a while.

I'm almost 18 now, and I can get them out easily. I'm comfortable with the cups, and LOVE the idea of them, except, they NEVER work for me. I must be doing something wrong but I don't know what. I've been working with it for probably 5 or so cycles.

For starters, I'm 17, a virgin, and I use a Lily Cup, size A. I think I have a bit of a tilted cervix, as it is usually towards the left. Sometimes, it doesn't leak, and sometimes it does. Sometimes, I can have it in for a while, it be fine, then I move a certain way and it leaks, but when I go to take it out, it is still 'sealed' or 'suctioned' (when I tug, it doesn't come out). Sometimes I'll think it's leaking because it is too full, but I find that it's hardly filled. Last night (first night on my cycle, very heavy) it lasted the whole night. I was paranoid about it, so I got up several times to make sure it wasn't leaking. All good. But I got up this morning, and after I stood up, it was like there was no cup, and blood leaked all over my underwear. When I went to remove the cup, it was still sealed and didn't feel like it had moved or anything.

The only thing I can think of that may be causing it, is the softness of the Lily Cup. I love the feel of it (compared to my old Diva), but it doesn't feel open when it's in. The rim is suctioned, but I've never had it open to full size inside of me, I don't think. It sort of takes on the size and shape of the vagina, and is a little bumpy and squished in there, if you run your finger around it, but not folded.

PLEASE help me! I'm determined to get this thing to work and LOVE it, but I'm getting discouraged.

Thanks in advance.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on August 28th, 2017 01:43 pm (UTC)
On phone so brief: If you haven't already, skim/read http://kuradi8.livejournal.com/
abbijel on August 28th, 2017 01:46 pm (UTC)
I have read that before... :(
abbijel on August 28th, 2017 02:05 pm (UTC)
I have wondered if it is a dngly cervix issue, but it doesn't feel dangly, and I don't think it would be that much blood after certain movements, would it?

And I'm still confused about the whole suction thing. When I get the cup in there, I play around with it until it 'seals' and can't be pulled out without squeezing or 'breaking' the seal, like the instructions say. Is that my problem?
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 28th, 2017 07:57 pm (UTC)
what makes you think it's not dangly? are you able to reach the "end" of your vagina?
rebecca2525rebecca2525 on August 28th, 2017 02:41 pm (UTC)
If you have a tilted cervix, it can happen that your cervix sits to the side of the cup's rim, or on top of the rim, instead of being properly inside. So it bleeds past the cup, basically. This happens to me on certain days, so I always feel with my finger around the rim and make sure that I can't feel my cervix anywhere.

If you have a dangly cervix, your cup would start overflowing before it's full (maybe when it's half full or 2/3 full), but it wouldn't leak right from the start, but only when it's reached the capacity your dangly cervix allows for. There's nothing to be done about that except empty it early enough or get a higher capacity cup. I have a dangly cervix, apparently, but I wouldn't have guessed it from what I feel with my fingers.

I don't have any experience with softer cups, but it's always said that any cup (except the FemmyCycle) needs to be fully open and not squished. What about your Diva? It's not as squishy and shouldn't have the same issue, so maybe try to get the Diva to work first?
abbijel on August 28th, 2017 10:09 pm (UTC)
I don't think it's a dangly cervix... Sometimes the leaks happen when the bottom of the cup is just barely full. The more I read, the more I am thinking it's an inserting/sealing/unfolding issue. I think I will try the Diva again :) Thank you!

Edited at 2017-08-28 10:28 pm (UTC)
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 28th, 2017 07:55 pm (UTC)
see this about popping open http://menstrual-cups.livejournal.com/2618390.html
do you still have your old diva? the lily is relatively low capacity, and it has a weird shape too. also, have you tried paying attention to which way you face the lower part of the rim?
if your diva was too long, try it inside out.
here's a high capacity chart :) http://menstrual-cups.livejournal.com/3607753.html don't be afraid of wider cups if your flow is heavy. i'm a virgin too but i this wasn't a problem, especially as i had already tried smaller cups first.

i get this morning gush too sometimes. could have to do with bowel movements. i also generally try to cover my vulva with my hand when i get up in the morning and i think my cup might be full. you might also want to keep cloth pads and/or paper towels handy for this morning walk.
abbijel on August 28th, 2017 10:27 pm (UTC)
I'm thinking that it is probably an inserting/unfolding issue, and I think I'll try the Diva again to see how it does.

I have been using the Lily all day, and it hasn't leaked since this morning when I got out of bed, but I've been paying extra attention to how it opens up.

**Thank you all for your help! I am really appreciating it!**