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goddessofgrunge
07 April 2016 @ 01:24 pm
Hi I'm new to this so I'm sorry if this is repetitive.

I'm looking for a new menstrual cup I have the Divacup but it won't fit I've tried the virgins guide to cups, all the different folds, using lube,etc. but none of it is working. I can't even get it in but when I sort of do it feels really... thick/hard and uncomfortable (almost painful) is it possible for a menstrual cup to be too hard? I have a high cervix but I'm very narrow. I'm leaning towards the Lilycup, Lilycup compact or the Lunette but I don't really know what I'm looking for I'd just like some help, I'll even take tips about the Divacup I just hate pads and never want to use tampons.

Again I'm really sorry if this is repetitive and you've seen it too many times I just need help.

Thank you.
 
 
Current Mood: confusedconfused
 
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on April 7th, 2016 09:19 pm (UTC)
The Diva is kind of rimmy and not the softest out there. You may indeed be better off with a softer cup. Good cups for the high cervix + soft combination include the Si-Bell, LuvUrBody, iCare, and indeed the Lily (if you don't mind the thick stem--my cervix drifted off center and then it kept poking me). If the Diva length is OK for you then the NaturalMamma and Rainbow are other options. I don't know that the Lunette is going to be much softer if at all.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on April 7th, 2016 10:19 pm (UTC)
PNQ and I disagree about the Diva often. It's not that hard. In fact, it rates a 4 (10 being stiffest) on one of the squishiness scales. And no, it's not particularly rimmy at all.

I think you should learn to work the cup that you already have, and then decide how well it fits you before you buy other cups. The only "bad" thing about the Diva is that the anti-suction holes around the rim are tiny. Skim/Read http://kuradi8.livejournal.com/ for helpful hints, including how to enlarge the holes.

I may be way off but I get the impression that you are not entirely comfortable with the act of insertion -- not just cups. Take your time and get more comfortable with yourself. Don't rush. Cups are patient.
goddessofgrungegoddessofgrunge on April 8th, 2016 12:24 am (UTC)
"I may be way off but I get the impression that you are not entirely comfortable with the act of insertion -- not just cups."

You would be right about that I've experienced years of sexual abuse so I'm very uncomfortable with it in a sense. I'll keep trying.

Thanks.
goddessofgrungegoddessofgrunge on April 8th, 2016 12:35 am (UTC)
Question.

What should I be looking for when wearing it? How should it feel?
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on April 8th, 2016 02:21 am (UTC)
How should it feel? Comfortable. It's OK to question it in the beginning. It's different for everyone. If you can "forget about it," then it's fine.

The next question is "Is it working?" Meaning is it catching flow without leaking? A little leakage, especially at first, is normal. There's a learning curve -- mostly learning to trust it and how long you can wear it each day/night before it needs attention. We each have our own tricks for getting it to open, getting it to settle in the right spot, getting it out without getting our hands messy, etc.

Awesome said the Diva "isn't one of the best cups." That's like saying size-9 pumps aren't the best shoes. If it fits you well then it's a perfectly fine cup. Just because it's the wrong size for some doesn't mean it's bad.

Again, figure out how to work the cup that you have. If it doesn't work right for you, figure out why. Is it too long/short, wide/narrow, pointy/blunt, soft/stiff, etc. And then use the size charts to compare its dimensions to other brands and then use photos to figure out what shape you think you'd like from those that you think would fit better.
goddessofgrungegoddessofgrunge on April 8th, 2016 03:15 am (UTC)
Again, thank you very much for the advice I'll keep trying.
awesome_12345 on April 7th, 2016 10:56 pm (UTC)
I agree with Kuradi. Take your time and definitely use the link above. Try a smaller fold like the punch-down fold or the seven fold or even try something like the labia fold or the origami fold. Start with baby steps like trying the punch-down fold and easing it gently in. Remember to aim for your tail bone or just stick a finger in as a guide so you know where to aim. Since you have a high cervix, the Diva should fit ( unlike a case like mine where I can't even fit a small Lunette ). Definitely don't buy a new cup right now; you are experiencing the learning curve right now so keep trying but don't irritate your vagina and make sure you are taking care of your cup. Good luck! Btw, the Divacup isn't one of the best cups out their but it's in stores so that makes people lean toward it but if you're getting a new cup, I suggest you look at the size charts ( linked from kuradi's link ).
seaweed88: pic#126028927seaweed88 on April 8th, 2016 05:18 am (UTC)
I can't feel my ruby cup at all. But the yuuki soft is just a smidge firmer and I can't totally feel it and find it very uncomfortable.

I agree with the others that you need to get comfortable with getting a cup in, but I don't necessarily think trying a different cup off the bat is a bad thing. But I am not a fan of physical discomfort.

If I had only tried a yuuki, I would have hated cups in general. Because I also have a ruby, I know a cup can be completely un-feel-able.
elisamba on April 8th, 2016 08:29 am (UTC)
I used no-applicator tampons for years before switching to a cup, and admire people who can just take the leap from using nothing internal to a cup. I don't think I could have, because let's face it, the cup is way wider, can pop open unexpectedly when inserting or removing - ouch - and suctions to the cervix, meaning we have to be comfortable inserting at least one knuckle of both thumb and forefinger.

What about starting out with something soft like sea sponges, to get more used to insertion and removal?
seaweed88: pic#126028927seaweed88 on April 8th, 2016 02:25 pm (UTC)
With the right technique, cups shouldn't pop open unexpectedly on removal or insertion. Bree's videos on YouTube are a great resource for this. Especially the one about how to painlessly remove a cup.
citrinesunset: Fountain pencitrinesunset on April 8th, 2016 12:42 pm (UTC)
I could definitely feel my cup more when I was just starting out. If there's pain, that's one thing, but a milder sensation of having something insids you might just be you getting used to it.

Some people say they can't feel their cups at all, but for me that varies. Sometimes I can't feel it much and can "forget" it. But if it's sitting lower inside my vagina, I'm definitely aware of it. What usually happens to me is that I'll be able to feel it more when I first put it in, but once it has a chance to ride up a little, I hardly feel it at all.

Cups are wider than tampons, so I think it's normal to be more aware of it at first.
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on April 9th, 2016 02:39 pm (UTC)
If popping open suddenly before insertion is complete is a problem (based on a couple comments)--try the labial fold. It works for my iCare though I don't know how it'll work on the Diva. Also, you may want to put lube on yourself with your nondominant hand and then insert the cup with your dominant hand. Lube on the same hand as the cup will cause it to either slip/pop open too early or fly out of your hand and then it may look like a murder scene!