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poppyhumming
Hello community! I specifically read through the sizing/size tag, as well as the FemmyCycle tag and didn't see my exact question asked yet, so I wanted to create an account and reach out for help.

I read good things and liked the design of the FemmyCycle, so I bought it as my first cup. I liked that I wouldn't have to worry about it opening properly, as this part of using a cup sounds tricky.

This cup does NOT work for me. It is made from a very thick, rigid silicone that is HUGE in any of the folds (c-fold ended up being most successful for me) and was quite painful to insert. Furthermore, once it was in, it rode higher and higher for the few minutes I left it in, to the point that it became VERY hard to locate, let alone put my finger through, the ring tab used to pull it out. I tried inserting it twice, and both times got a bit panicked that I wouldn't be able to take it out. I am not sure where my cervix sits, but since I'm not tall and it does sometimes get hit during intercourse, I never thought that it sits high. However, I do admit that I also dislike applicator-less tampons because they are so short to me.

I am now looking for a long cup that could accommodate a high cervix. However, I don't want it to be large in width or have thick material, as I don't want it to be as painful to insert as this one is. Does such a thing exist? I am 25 and have never had kids. Any help is appreciated.
 
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on January 28th, 2016 03:22 am (UTC)
Compare the dimensions of the small Diva using the size charts at http://sizecharts.livejournal.com/ or others at the Community FAQ. If you get one, you'll probably want to enlarge the anti-suction holes around the rim. There are many knock-off/generic cups on eBay that have similar dimensions but longer stems. Most of them only have 2 tiny anti-suction holes instead of 4 so you'll add and enlarge if you get one of them instead.

Edited to add: And if you haven't already, skim/read http://kuradi8.livejournal.com/

Edited at 2016-01-28 03:23 am (UTC)
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 28th, 2016 04:24 am (UTC)
Thank you for the advice! I have read that the DivaCups run the largest and have some of the most rigid material? I wish it was easier to test some of these items out! I will read up on the DivaCup small size. Thank you for the tip on the anti-suction holes. The FemmyCycle doesn't have these at all (supposedly to make it more hygienic), so that will be a good tip to keep in mind.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on January 28th, 2016 01:14 pm (UTC)
"Largest." Some cups are long, some are wide, some are wide and long. So it all depends on what you mean by "large." No, the Diva is not stiff at all. It rates a 4 out of 10 (10 being stiffest) on the squishiness scale that someone here made up several years ago. There should be a link to it at the site(s) I gave you. Holes have nothing to do with "hygienic." The anti-suction holes make it easier to pop open and to break the seal for removal.
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 28th, 2016 05:17 pm (UTC)
To clarify, I'm looking for a cup that has a smaller circumference when folded. The FemmyCycle has a VERY thick doubled-up (due to the no-spill design) outer edge, so in any fold it is extremely large at the tip. Again, I haven't tried out any other cups, so I'm not sure if I'd experience the same problem with them. I'd like something that's less thick and smaller when folded properly for insertion.

Right, I also air-quoted hygienic because I believe it's simply a gimmick feature for FemmyCycle. The idea is that no holes = no gunk to clean out of holes.

Thank you for the charts. I haven't heard of all the cups mentioned and measured, but since you suggested it will look into the smaller Divacup in particular. Thanks again for your advice.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on January 28th, 2016 09:47 pm (UTC)
As for folding smaller, cup width is measured at the rim but the body of your Femmycycle is wider than its rim -- so just about all other cups will be smaller when folded. Click on the links for various folds at the Common Questions post to see if you like any of those better than the one(s) you've been using.
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 29th, 2016 03:22 am (UTC)
Thank you Kuradi! Yes, looking at the example pictures, I'm now getting envious of how thin and flexible the example cups are. I feel like the FemmyCycle's edge is too thick to even hold many of these folds in place, let alone hold the completed fold with my hand while trying to insert it (like the punch-down fold).
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on February 1st, 2016 06:00 pm (UTC)
I had a Femmy for a year and a half or so and used a triangle/7-fold. Smaller insertion point than the C fold. I figured out that a more traditional cup design would be less fussy for me so I sold mine off but this might help in the meantime!
newconvert on January 28th, 2016 03:27 am (UTC)
One thing to consider is where in your cycle you were: your cervix is higher at certain points so a cup that seems too short on a dry run might be exactly what you need on the heaviest days of your period. I've never tried the FemmyCycle but my experience has been that firmness can make a big difference -- a larger, softer cup might fold better and be more comfortable on insertion and removal than a firmer one that can't be folded as small... but it's a very personal preference and everyone is different! With enough practice I'm sure you will find the right fold to insert a cup and get it to open reliability; it's really not as difficult as it sounds. :)
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 28th, 2016 04:27 am (UTC)
It wasn't a dry run. The cup intimidated me, so I waited until the first day of my period. Can you recommend a more fold-y cup, one that's either long or that has a long tab. Honestly if the FemmyCycle were a little less rigid/large, I would consider figuring out a way to ADD a longer tab or string during each cycle, though I'm not positive how sanitary that would be.
kripaluyogini: pic#125743053kripaluyogini on January 29th, 2016 01:30 am (UTC)
I have a high cervix and use a Diva Cup Size 1. I am 36, no kids. I went with a size one because I have strong pelvic muscles and tighter hips. The size 2 would probably be fine too.

The Diva cup, after insertion, just floats up to my cervix and offers leak free protection.

When removing the cup I ALWAYS have to bear down two or three times to move the cup down to where I can reach just the stem. When I get hold of the stem I bear down one more time and put a finger on the side to push in a break the seal. I have to keep bearing down to remove.

Work on those muscles!

The Diva cup is sturdier but I prefer that for easier opening. I use a 7 fold and the tip is quite small that way. Just breathe and relax and glide the folded cup up past the muscles. Relaxing is really key. The vaginal opening can expand to accommodate a baby's head among other things. Inserted a folded cup should not cause pain. Nothing is tearing or jabbing when you insert. That opening is meant to expand and does without pain. Try sitting on the toilet and opening your legs wide. RELAX and insert slowing while breathing out gently.

You may try lube or water to help it glide. Even a little blood helps insertion!

Edited at 2016-01-29 01:48 am (UTC)
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 29th, 2016 03:13 am (UTC)
Thank you for the tips, Krip!

I have VERY tight hips (think pigeon pose, all day every day), so I will try the Diva Cup size 1 (this is the smaller size, yes?).

Hmm. Do you ever worry that the cup will shift so that the stem is inside, and you can't reach it? As in, your fingers might be able to brush against the smooth outer part of the cup, but not the stem in order to pull it out? I read a few reviews left by women who had that happen with the FemmyCycle, but the FemmyCycle has a small loop pull tab, not a stem, so I am thinking a stem would make this much more unlikely?

Haha, well the body does prepare 9 months for a baby's head, and even then tearing is common. Then again, I'm sure I don't have some special magical vagina that just happens to be the only vagina too sensitive for a menstrual cup. It might be a mental block, but I found the FemmyCycle very short and very thick, thus very awkward to insert while also squeezing it shut to maintain the fold. Maybe will give the Diva Cup a try, and if it doesn't work simply admit that menstrual cups aren't the right choice for me at the moment. Thank you again!
kripaluyogini: pic#125743053kripaluyogini on January 29th, 2016 04:40 am (UTC)
When I go to remove the cup, the stem is always inside, not in easy reach. That's just where my cup goes. That's why I have to bear down pretty much continuously to help move it into reach until I can finally grab it. It takes some work but once you get the hang of it it doesn't take long. The stem is always the first thing I grab, mine doesn't shift sideways if that's what you mean.

elisamba on January 29th, 2016 07:28 am (UTC)
Gaia
My favourite long is the Gaia. I also have a high cervix and the cup sits just inside the vaginal entrance, easy to reach for removal by pinching the base. I have the small Gaia but I think the company may not be making two sizes anymore; the only difference was 1 mm in both length and width anyway, and 1 ml in capacity, so some people wondered what the difference was supposed to be. One Italian menstrual cup site says the large is barely firmer, but I have not seen it to compare. The silicone is very flexible, so I use the full diamond fold and it folds up to tampon size. Full diamond means: fold one rim down on itself on the outside of the cup (not inward) to touch the base of the cup, making a slight diamond shape, then bring the right and left "points" of the diamond together.
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 29th, 2016 06:49 pm (UTC)
Re: Gaia
Thank you! The Gaia does sound perfect, and I like the sound of the diamond fold. The c-fold definitely wasn't my first choice, but the other folds were harder to keep in tact during insertion due to the FemmyCycle's thick material.
glioncourtglioncourt on January 29th, 2016 06:11 pm (UTC)
The FemmyCycle's format intimidates me and I'm a 2 year cup user!

Besides the sizecharts that were already suggested to you, I'd also recommend you google "menstrual cup softness comparison" and also look at some comparison videos on youtube. I have found these particularly helpful: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cny51r22rHQ and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSqCs8HqLbI. You can search for more.

About opening the cup, I don't really think it's as difficult as it sounds, not if your cup is a good size for you. I've only had difficulty with Meluna Soft because it's extra soft and doesn't get a good seal with me.

Also experiment with different folding techniques... I like the punch down a lot better than the C fold.

I hope that helped!
poppyhummingpoppyhumming on January 29th, 2016 06:51 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! Very helpful!

As to the FemmyCycle . . . I didn't know! It looked very hygienic and sturdy, whereas other cups were frosted rainbow-colored and looked rinky dink. It looked the most . . . medical? If that makes sense?
glioncourtglioncourt on January 29th, 2016 07:00 pm (UTC)
It does make sense. I'm not an expert, I felt like a newbie all of my first cup year... I still have some issues... I just bought my 3rd cup... looking for my Goldilocks, still.... I find the videos very helpful, you can find reviews of mostly any brand. I like having a reference to size and softness before deciding what to buy.

Another thing I forgot to mention, my cervix during my period seems to sit really high. Like you, I have to really reach in to get my shorter cup, but I don't think that's too much of an issue. You eventually get used to it. I have found that width and softness are my primary concern right now. If I focus on longer cups, I restrict myself to fewer brands. That's my personal opinion right now, I don't know if it's the same for everyone.
jezebelsblues on January 30th, 2016 10:53 am (UTC)
kindred spirit
Like you I have a high cervix and I had a problem removing the Femmycycle cup. I have also tried the large, LuvUrBody cup that was long and made of a softer silicone. However, I found the softer material problematic because it wouldn't fully open and leaking would occur. The two cups that work best for me happen to be the two first cups I ever bought, the Mia and the Lunette. The Mia cup I have in both small and large sizes. And, while the material is softer than the Femmycycle it is thicker than the LuvUrBody giving it more fortitude and ability to open without problems. The Lunette is a firmer cup, but it is a narrower shape than the Femmycycle and is easier to insert for this reason. So, I wouldn't rule out a firmer cup. Even, if a narrower cup is made of a firm material it will be easier to insert than the Femmycycle just because of the difference in shape.