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25 December 2015 @ 09:16 pm
Hey Everyone! I've been lurking around this community for a few months, and I've decided to get my friend to pick up a cup for me when she visits the US. Because I'm only 13 and have got parents who do not allow me to use tampons and cups, I am unable to order online for a cup, and the only cup my friend has found available in America is the Divacup, and recently I've been wondering if I could still use it.

So I did what a lot of blogs and websites told me to do, and I shoved my index finger up my vagina. about 2 1/2 knuckles in, I felt a round and slightly slippery thing, with a small hole in the middle. I assume that that's my cervix, and after measuring my finger, which is about 8cm long total, I concluded that my cervix is about 6 cm deep and slightly to the right. However, if I reached my finger up higher, I could still go on the left side up a little more.

I assume that means I have a medium cervix, and after hearing a lot of people talking about how the divacup is a long cup, I was wondering if it'll even fit me, or if it's just going to be a waste of money. Please note that I am only 13, and I've approached my parents about the topic before, and all they've done is talk about how it's going to break my hymen and that it'll make me a slut, so I'm just asking for any advice on whether the divacup will work, if I should just stick to the organyc tampons and pantiliners I use, and if the cup will work, anything that I should be particularly weary of when using the cup.

Thanks in Advance!</div>

Update: Well, my friend just told me she already got the cup. Just waiting for her to come back so I can try it, and I'll post another update after that's done.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on December 25th, 2015 02:54 pm (UTC)
CAN you use a cup? Yeah, probably.
MAY you use a cup? Not according to your parents.
lindxx on December 29th, 2015 02:35 am (UTC)
Oh, sorry! Just realized what you meant! Sorry about the wording, I wasn't trying to ask if I MAY use a cup, I was just trying to ask if anyone in the community has similar experiences to mine, and whether the cup is likely to fit me.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on December 29th, 2015 03:11 am (UTC)
And my point was that even though you are likely to be able to use a cup, you are "only 13" (you said that twice so it must be important) and would be defying your parents wishes to do so. You asked. They answered.

Do I/we think you CAN use a cup, specifically the Diva? Yeah, probably.
Do I/we think you'll be able to persuade your parents? Maybe eventually.
Do I think you should defy your parents? No. Not because I agree with them (I don't) but because they are your parents.
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on December 26th, 2015 04:34 pm (UTC)
Ugh, I'm sorry that your parents have their heads shoved up their behinds...possibly a religious household? I feel your pain. I grew up with a LOT of people sort of in that vein (Christian). Wish I could give you a hug!

I do think the Diva may be a tiny bit long though. The Lunette is possible (with stem, the length will be about the same as your Diva but the cup body itself is shorter) and relatively easy for your friend to find. Or, if possible, a member here could send a secondhand cup to your friend while she's in the US and she can bring it back for you. That's probably faster than ordering a new one from a website. The cup sales community is mc_sales if you want to check anything out!
lindxx on December 28th, 2015 12:16 am (UTC)
*gives you a hug*

I'm not actually raised in a religious household, in fact my parents actually always insist on not being religious. I guess they're just quite old fashioned and believe that the hymen is a sign of purity and virginity.

Also, Thanks for the suggestion! I'm going to check them out and just see what I end up with, and hope for the best :)
perideaux on December 28th, 2015 08:44 am (UTC)
Ooh, I had the same exact upbringing. Non-religious family with a hymen obsession. I casually told my mom that I borrowed a tampon from a friend when I started my period at school and used it. After that point, since I had already started with tampons, she gave up and started buying them for me. I think your folks may come around eventually, most do.

mc_sales is honestly so much more cost-effective, I've purchased three cups from there and I've had nothing but good experiences. If you're worried about using a secondhand cup, you can look up how to sanitize a cup on here. Sellers will sanitize the cup for you before they send it, though.
lindxx on December 28th, 2015 09:40 am (UTC)
I hope they do! Last time I mentioned tampons to my mum she she sort of exploded, and whenever my mum explodes she goes into a rant frenzy which is extremely dangerous for everyone's eardrums. I might try to just say to her that I used one before and hope she just accepts it.
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on December 28th, 2015 07:33 pm (UTC)
Sounds like my mom. LOL. I'm getting an earful while visiting my parents because she's dealing with a great-aunt who is having some possible dementia issues...both very STRONG personalities...

I always find the virginity/purity obsession odd when it's not accompanied by a religion that tells you to think that way! But maybe just knowing that you tried a tampon/cup would, as the other poster mentioned, cause them to drop it.

(Hey, at least tampons/cups can't get you pregnant. That is a legitimate worry for families with teens, no matter what religious tradition or lack thereof!)
lindxx on December 29th, 2015 12:58 am (UTC)
My parents are just sort of the type who think that anything they haven't heard of is bad for you. I've even brought up cloth pads, and my mum still talked about how it was like that when she got her period, and I tried to explain to her that just using cloth is different from cloth pads, and that they're more comfortable, but she wouldn't hear any of it. Just all about how disposable pads are so much more convenient.

And the inconvenient thing is that a lot of people in Hong Kong (where I live)seem to follow that thinking. At the period section at the store, there's like a full isle of pads, and a small sad shelf holding tampons and organic pads. I'm like spending so much money on organic pantiliners and tampons, so I'm hoping that once the cup arrives I'll be able to get rid of that stress.
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on December 30th, 2015 08:47 pm (UTC)
I hope your friend can get you a cup that works out! If not, I think there are a decent number of cup users in Singapore and Australia too, so next time you have a friend heading out to those places it could be possible to ship there. :)
..::bella vita::..por_que_no on December 26th, 2015 04:43 pm (UTC)
Sayga: cat-artemis runningsayga on December 29th, 2015 07:26 pm (UTC)
I hope the diva works for you. If not, try turning it inside out to make it shorter. I was only able to wear my Diva inside out. However, my cervix is so low that at its lowest (it moves up and down during my cycle) I can touch it if I insert my finger only to the first knuckle, so when it's super low like that, I can't wear the Diva at all, even inside out.

Good luck getting through to your parents. When I was 15, I had the heaviest periods, and my mom only got me pads, didn't even tell me about tampons. I knew about them but I dunno, thought she wouldn't let me or something. I'd overflow every other month or so and have to have her come get me from school. It was awful. Wish I'd had a cup back then, or even a tampon with a pad as back up. Would have been a lot less embarrassing. Anyway, I've found that my parents were more receptive to things if I brought them an article or read it to them, if I didn't think they'd look at it themselves. When they felt I'd actually researched something, they were more willing to discuss it than if they thought it was an impulse (even if it wasn't).

My daughter is 11 and I already have the smallest/teen size MeLuna cup in the back of my drawer, waiting for her to start her period and be ready to use something besides a pad. We also took a day and sewed our own cloth pads, which is another alternative if you can sew, or want to learn.
lindxx on December 30th, 2015 11:57 am (UTC)
Kudos to you for preparing your daughter for her period, and not being close minded like a lot of parents now. I actually talked to my parents specifically and told them I did a lot of research, but they still denied it, and even my dad (who is usually pretty level headed in situations like these) told me that I should listen to my mum since she has more experience, which I highly doubt. I don't think my mum's even seen a menstrual cup or tampon before, and she didn't know about cups until I talked to her a little about it.

My period just ended today, so when my friend brings me the divacup I'll be quite close to my period and probably able to try it out along with the Lunette cup which I plan on buying since I found one near where I live.
Also, what did you do on the days your cervix was really low? I don't think my cervix moves around too much, since I am able to insert tampons, but what do you do when you only have to put 1 knuckle in to reach your cervix? Do you just use cloth pads, or use a smaller cup?