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hollybear9420
Hello everyone!
I'm new to this community as well as menstrual cups. I just got my Divacup (Model 1) last night and used it overnight.
Here's some info about me before I go into the issues I had with it: I'm 21, not a virgin but I haven't had sex in months. Even when I was sexually active, it took a long time for me to be able to have sex semi-comfortably. In other words, any kind of penetration is generally uncomfortable, and slightly painful for me. I find my vaginal opening to be very sensitive, but once I push past that, I'm okay.  I started my period at 12 and used pads exclusively because the first time I tried tampons scared me so much that I never tried them again until I was 20. For about a year now, I've learned how to use tampons, but I wanted to switch to the cup instead.

The first time I inserted my cup last night I used the 7 fold and didn't hear a suction or pop or anything, so I wasn't sure if it was inserted correctly, so I tried to take it out to start over. Removal was really painful for me because the seal wouldn't break even with me squeezing the base of the cup. I read quite a few posts on here that say to insert a finger alongside the cup and push on the vaginal wall to break the seal, but 1) It hurts to have anything more than my index finger and thumb in there at one time and 2) pushing on the wall didn't help me (I could have been doing it wrong, though).
Eventually I did get it out, and it was painful (I think because it came out fully open.)
The second time I inserted the cup I tried the punch down fold and I was still feeling some pain that I attributed to the stem being too long. So I took it out again, trimmed the stem, and reinserted a third time using the punch down fold again. The third time I did hear a suctiony noise and it seemed okay. I put on a pad to catch any leaks and went to bed.
I woke up this morning and there was very minimal spotting on the pad. Removal took about 10 minutes because it took a while for me to kegel the cup down and get a good grip on the base. Once again, when it finally came out, it was super painful because it popped open fully before it was all the way out.
Before I reinserted the cup I tried to feel for my cervix, but I had no luck. I put my middle finger in and got to a point where I couldn't really go any farther, but I didn't feel a donut shape, or whatever I was supposed to feel according to Google.
Once I did reinsert, I tried to feel around the cup to make sure it was open, but it kind of felt like the sides were like this )( and I had no idea how to fix that problem.

So here are my questions.
1) How do I find my cervix? If I do find it, I should aim the cup toward it when inserting, right?
2) What are some ways to break the seal if I can't get many fingers in my vagina? (Rotating my cup was impossible)
3) I've read that you can enlarge the suction holes. Could I use a toothpick, and would it make breaking the seal a little easier?
4) How should I remove the cup so it doesn't pop open before it's out of my vagina?

Thank you so much in advance to anyone that can help. I apologize that this is so long!
 
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on December 24th, 2015 10:21 pm (UTC)
1. Your cup will probably position itself by itself. You only need to go hunting for your cervix if you find that you're missing it more often than not.

2. You don't need to rotate your cup. Try one finger "hot dog in a bun" to break the seal and slide it out.

3. A toothpick will only stretch the hole temporarily.

4. Tilt it out at an angle so it's not the whole rim at once.

Skim/Read http://kuradi8.livejournal.com/ for more helpful hints.
hollybear9420hollybear9420 on December 26th, 2015 09:20 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much for your help! The hot dog in a bun trick is very helpful, and since I started doing that I haven't had as much trouble. I've read your other hints and they are great! Thanks for taking the time to write them all. :)
jourdanicus on December 24th, 2015 11:48 pm (UTC)
Hey! Welcome to cup usage~ I'm 21 also, and been using cups for over two years now. You'll get the hang of it! (And if you don't... don't sweat it. Everyone's different. :) )

1 - You can find your cervix by inserting a finger into your vagina as deeply as you can (be gentle of course). If you don't feel anything, try lying down or squatting, or wait until a different time in your cycle. The cervix can be higher or lower depending on where you are in your cycle - for example, many women's cervices are very low during the first day or so of their period. It could be different for you. It does not feel like a donut, in my opinion. I've heard it described as having a similar firmness to the cartilage-y tip of your nose. It does have a hole, called the os, but it's not as proportionately big as the hole of a donut, if that makes sense. This website - http://beautifulcervix.com/ - really helped me understand how to find it, what is normal, etc etc. You can even request a speculum from them if you get really interested and want to try looking inside yourself with a mirror! Using a mirror even without a speculum might help. It's always useful to get familiar with your vulva, even if you can't see into your vagina. As far as the cup, it can help to aim, but it's not necessary. It can help during insertion to aim it sort of toward the small of your back, just because that's the angle your vagina is at when you're sitting down, but that mostly just helps you get it in rather than around your cervix. I wouldn't worry so much about getting it exactly where it should be yet, until you can comfortably GET it in and out.

2 - I can usually break the seal of mine by firmly holding the stem with my index finger and thumb of one hand, and reaching the index finger of my other hand inside, up as far as I can to the side or even the rim of the cup, and pushing it so that the cup folds inside me which breaks the seal. Keeping the pressure on the cup, I pull on the stem and bear down slightly to remove it. This can be kind of messy, because folding it pushes out its contents and you can get blood on your fingers. But it always works for me to get it out. As long as you keep consistent pressure on the cup with the single finger that's folding it, it shouldn't pop open before it comes all the way out. Just try to relax and go slowly, because if you rush you might get your finger out before the cup and it will pop open. If it does pop open, just pause - don't pull it out when it's open because as you know, that's what hurts. Wiggle your finger in again and try to fold the cup and remove it folded instead of just yanking it out after it pops back open.

3 - I don't think that's necessary. There are even cups with no air holes, and one should be able to remove all kinds of cups regardless. If you're having problems with it popping open too early, that might be an issue of the firmness of the cup. Different cups can be softer or firmer. For example, I have a Moon Cup and a Lunette Cup. The Moon Cup is pretty similar to the Diva, and the rim is kind of hard. There is more resistance when folding, and it unfolds fast and easy by itself (though sometimes kind of painfully if it's sudden). The Lunette is a lot squishier, with a softer rim. It's super easy to fold but kind of more difficult to unfold; since it's not as firm, it doesn't pop open on its own as easily. If you keep having trouble with the Diva Cup, you might want to try a softer cup (there's info about the softness of different brands of cup in this Livejournal group, not sure exactly where though - look for cup comparison posts) until you get the hang of cup usage in general.

4 - I already kind of answered this in #2. Again, just try to relax and go slow. If you are nervous and clenching your pelvic muscles, it can be a lot harder to fit your fingers + a cup in there, but it should be possible if you are relaxed. It may sound weird but you can also use (water based) lube to help get your cup and fingers in and out (not necessarily forever, but at least until you are more practiced). Sometimes if I'm having a "dry" day I even just wet my hands with water and that helps.

Good luck!!

Edited at 2015-12-24 11:51 pm (UTC)
hollybear9420hollybear9420 on December 26th, 2015 09:26 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply! Folding it while removing has definitely helped. The trickiest part of removal for me now is just getting a grip on the base of the cup. I think a lot of my issues were just from not using it enough yet, because now that I've inserted and removed it a few times, it's a little easier. I'm certain though that after a few cycles I'll have it pretty much down. Even if I do have slight difficulties, I'm just glad I don't have to use tampons anymore haha! Thank you again ^_^