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Hello! I'm Emily and I'm 30 (married but no children). I'm trying to figure out which cup is best for me. I'm sick of using tampons and haven't used pads since I was 12. I tried using the reusable Instead Softcup and still haven't figured out where to position it. I can barely get it past my pubic bone because my fingers are short, so it pokes out slightly from my pubic bone and will leak. I also haven't been able to find my cervix. I've tried using my index and middle fingers and just can't seem to reach it. I read that the Diva Cup might be a good cup to try out because of length but I'm greatly considering the Lilycup. I've heard amazing things about the smooth silicone and I can't help but find the design aesthetically pleasing, though I'm trying really hard not to let looks influence my purchase decision! I just tried finding my cervix again from a standing position and think I might have found it? Is it behind your pubic bone? I'm on my period now, which seems like a good time to figure out where your cervix is so you figure out length of cup needed? Idk! I'm feeling clueless and lost!
I'm using the Softcup right now and I feel miserable. I think it's pressing against my cervix because I'm cramping really bad. It's also leaking, I think because I just can't seem to position it correctly.

I just feel lost about all of this and what cup to buy, but I know I'm sick of messing with the Instead Softcup.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on April 14th, 2015 08:18 pm (UTC)
There are sizing guidelines and comparative charts at http://sizecharts.livejournal.com/ to help you figure out what might fit/suit you best.

Edited to add: As for Insteads, don't aim them "up" like you would a tampon. Aim them (excuse me) toward your asshole instead. Then hook the front lip up over your pubic bone. They should slide in and out like a drawer. But they don't fit everyone so you're not doing anything wrong if they don't work right for you. Personally, I thought Insteads are messy and that they work better on light days than heavy. I prefer menstrual cups.

Edited at 2015-04-14 08:26 pm (UTC)
Emilybaroque_nomonet on April 15th, 2015 05:05 am (UTC)
Thanks! The link has some good advice. "Don't pick a brand or length first. Go by actual dimensions." That's exactly what I needed to see! I'm going to try the Softcup for the rest of my period to see if I can get it to work and if not then realize it's not for me. I'm going to continue my search for a cup!
tkamockingbird on April 14th, 2015 11:15 pm (UTC)
Hi Emily! It sounds like you are really frusterated, but trust me, I think a lot of us have felt the same way at some point. I also had a hard time finding my cervix at first. I never heard of trying to find your cervix until I started using cups. I would stick my middle finger in and I could never locate it. Then, I discovered that my cervix was all the way to the left and not in the middle. When I felt it, I knew I had found it because it didn't feel like anything else and it felt like the tip of my nose. I also have small fingers, but my middle finger reached it if I put it all the way in. But yours might be lower or higher everyone is different. When you look for it, just relax and make sure you wet your finger before inserting it. THen, when you find it, you will be able to determine if you need that long of a cup! Good luck! Let me know it goes!
Emilybaroque_nomonet on April 15th, 2015 05:09 am (UTC)
Thank you! It's comforting to know I'm not alone in my frustrations. I'm going to try finding my cervix again tomorrow after I've relaxed and have plenty of time to search.
tkamockingbird on April 15th, 2015 08:04 pm (UTC)
Oh trust me, I was so frusterated for the first couple of days and I was ready to sell my cups. Then I talked to someone on a wordpress blog and it motivated me to give it one more shot and it worked! Now I'm a happy cup user! It will work, just give it time :)