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01 March 2014 @ 02:40 pm
Warning: I try not to hold back on my description...y'all seemed to be pretty open people when it comes to your anatomy and what goes on down there, so I think I'm good..if not..just uh, walk on by if this sort of thing bothers you.

Well, I've jumped through quite a few hoops to try and figure out how to post to this forum...I apologize in advance if this is placed in the wrong spot, or somehow just...not right haha, but I *reallY* need some help.

So I've been reading about menstrual cups and reusable pads for ages now...I want to say about two years. After deciding reusable pads were too expensive, and seemed quite messy in comparison to the cup, I decided to order my first cup.

I ordered the Lady Cup in a size small about 6 months ago. I was so excited for my period to get here so I could try it out. Well, being a 16 year old virgin, I hadn't had anything up there. I hadn't even used tampons before this. I've heard about the whole abrasive fibers and TSS risk thing and I thought "How about no..."

When I tried to insert the cup, I had immediate pain. It wasn't something that was unbearable, but it was *very* uncomfortable. The cup, even though it's one of the smallest, was just too large. I figured "Well, best experiment with tampons then" ... so that's what I did. I put it off for a few months, but finally, about three cycles ago, I started using tampons. *insert Aladdin and Jasmine singing "a whole new world" here* It was so much nicer than wearing a pad. I knew that if I could master this, I could master the cup eventually.

Well, fast forward a couple months and you've reached last night. Last night I decided to try my cup (I dunno where the motivation came from..) again since getting used to inserting things into my vagina. It was a little difficult to say the least. This is where the questioning comes in.

- One, the dang thing kept popping open and slipping when I was trying to insert it. It would snap before I even got it in, which didn't feel too great. It also painted a "pretty" Friday the 13th scene on the wall in front of me. Gross. I tried the C fold, the 7 fold, and the push down (I think that's the last one...push in? push down? I'm sure you get the point) The pushdown worked the best for me in the end, but with every fold it seemed like I'd have to grab close to the mouth of the cup to keep it from popping open prematurely. If I did that, I couldn't fit the cup (with my fingers still attached to it) inside me. If I grabbed closer to the bottom, that thing would pop open and I'd have to start over.

Is there a nifty trick to keep this from happening??

- Second problem was removing it the next morning. After the fiasco of getting it in, I was quite proud of myself. It wasn't very comfortable though. A tampon, I can forget it's there. This one wasn't TERRIBLY uncomfortable, but I was definitely aware of its presence...Anyways, I'm going to dig into the little "sub problems"

Sub problem 1: The thing traveled way up in there. I couldn't see the stem anymore! I couldn't get my fingers up far enough to break the seal. It's a tight squeeze in there, and trying to maneuver my fingers through there was NOT easy. I don't know how but I somehow broke the seal with some wiggling and squeezing.

Sub problem 2: while the wiggling and squeezing wasn't a problem, taking it out was the worst thing I had ever felt down there (at this point) I watched a video last night to prepare myself. They said angle it down so it didn't hit your urethra because that's what hurts...also to push down on it and create almost like a c-fold inside you. Well, I tried that and it felt like someone took a knife to my personal area. When I finally got it out, it snapped open and again, like I mentioned earlier, that did NOT feel good.

I decided that the cup deserved another shot...it only took me a few tries this time, and I got it in there. The suction was different than the last time...last time I heard it, but didn't feel it. This time was the opposite. I felt the cup suck itself inwards (you know, when you suck on a juice pouch and it collapses?) I decided it was sealed, and I'd just let it go. Well I began to feel very uncomfortable, so about two or three hours later, I decided to take the thing out again and just wear a pad..enough experimenting for one day...holy lord that was the most painful thing I've ever been through.

It was the same pain as before, but only intensified. I tried everything I could do to not irritate myself, but nothing worked. 45 seconds of holding back screams later, and the little demon cup was out. I felt like it had something to do with the big rim..but when I see it in comparison to other cups, it's the same size if not smaller. Either way I do *NOT* want to put my cup back in if I'm going to have that much pain and difficulty taking it out...

So I guess my question is how can I make insertion a little easier, and how on earth do I take it out with as little pain as possible??

I know other questions have been similar to mine, but I hadn't found a question relating to a person of my age who is also a virgin.

Again, my apologies if this is in the wrong place...I just really want to use my cup.
rednikki on March 1st, 2014 10:00 pm (UTC)
Regarding popping open again and slipping when you try to insert it - I've been using my cup for about 6 years now and it still happens occasionally. This is one of those things where you get better with practice. I generally use the 7 fold, but YMMV.

Regarding pulling it out - honestly, I just reach up, grab mine by the stem and pull it toward the opening of my vagina. Once I get it down far enough then comes all the other stuff.

So far as the pain you're feeling, I do not have a perspective on that. It could be a hymen issue - when I broke mine I had a feeling very much like you describe and it freaked me out! There is also the possibility of vaginismus - sometimes tampons are not an issue but larger objects are. The latter would be a question for your doctor (IANAD).
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on March 1st, 2014 11:32 pm (UTC)
Go to the Community FAQ and read the Virgin's Guide to Cups. There are other posts there that will probably interest you as well. Also read the replies to posts about removal. The idea is to get air into/above your cup so it doesn't cause suction. And because the Lady Cup is a rather slippery one, check out some posts that give good advice on how to keep a good grip on yours.

I think most of your pain is related to "clenching" your pelvic floor (PC) muscles. You will find some good advice about learning to relax them under both the insertion and removal tags.
eccentrgrl on March 2nd, 2014 09:51 am (UTC)
I would also suggest a softer cup. The ladycup definitely has a very firm rim and can hurt my bits down there too with removing (and I'm an almost 35 year old mom of 2). I hear the si-bell (if you want a round bottom cup) is very soft and I KNOW the CupLee (if you want a cone shaped cup) is very very soft. It never ever hurts because the rim is so pliable and soft. The punch down fold works beautifully with it and won't hurt when it opens up. If you want to insert your cup higher before letting it fold open, the triangle fold works the best for me (I use that fold for firmer cups).
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on March 2nd, 2014 01:49 pm (UTC)
I disagree with advice to get another cup -- YET. It's not the cup, it's your technique. Get through the learning curve with the one that you have now. Then use what you like and don't about it to decide if you want another, and what its dimensions and features should be.
a clockwork cuttlefishcastalianspring on March 2nd, 2014 03:27 pm (UTC)
I would agree if it wasn't the Ladycup she's having trouble with. That cup is slippery. It was my first cup as well and I never mastered it, but then I switched to a Lunette and it all fell into place. For virgins especially, I think having a cup they can easily grip with only two fingers for removal is crucial, lest they give up entirely.