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04 January 2014 @ 09:37 pm
I am the mother is a 12 year old competitive gymnast that just started her period for the first time. She is contemplating quitting gymnastics because of the discomfort and potential embarrassment. Can someone PLEASE guide us with were to start?? We bought a divacup because that was the only thing sold in stores. But, when we got home it seemed intimidating and too large. With that, any assistance with inserting would also be appreciated.

Thanks
 
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on January 5th, 2014 04:26 am (UTC)
Check out the Community FAQ. There is a great post with really good replies called "A Virgin's Guide to Cups." And another about "Myths" that dispels a lot of the misinformation in the instruction guides that come with ALL cups.

The best thing to do is DON'T PUSH OR RUSH your daughter. She is new to her period. She is new to her body. And she is new to the concept/act of insertion. There is a learning curve to these cups and (like all of us) she will probably have a disaster or two along the way.

The Diva happens to be a long cup -- but that's not necessarily a bad thing. If it turns out that she has a long vagina, reaching the base for adjustment and removal will be much easier than with a short-bodied cup. If it turns out to be too long for her, flipping the cup inside out will shorten it -- but don't do that until she is adept at removal. As for width, it's only negligibly wider than the narrowest cups so don't sweat that.

The Diva has notoriously tiny anti-suction holes around the rim. They help with popping open and also breaking the seal for removal. Many users have had better luck after enlarging them. Something like a piercing tool or punch will probably leave a less ragged hole than a drill bit or scissors. The holes on the cup with the biggest holes are 2mm.

FYI, I was 12 when I found my mother's cup. "It's for periods," she said. "Do you want one too?" I shook my head NO and "EEEEWWWW" fell out of my mouth before I could stop myself. I regretted that for decades before I finally got one.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on January 5th, 2014 02:11 pm (UTC)
Adding another 2c:
If she decides that she wants a different cup or you decide that you want one too, then check out the size charts at http://sizecharts.livejournal.com/ or others at the Community FAQ. There are now over 30 (!!!) brands plus knock-offs to choose from. The Size Charts link breaks it down to 3 width and 5 length categories. Use them to eliminate those that you don't think will fit, then narrow your choices by capacity, shape and other features.

Occasionally (just like when trying on clothes or shoes) you'll get a cup that fits OK but just doesn't sit right -- and another cup with similar dimensions but a slightly different shape will be just right. Many of those cups wind up at the mc_sales site -- and that's a good place to pick up a gently used 2nd hand cup.

Many of us have more than one cup. For example, I have a heavy days cup and a light days cup.

Keep asking us questions. We are all enthusiastic and experienced cup users. We can point you to distributors and offer helpful hints and encouragement.
(Deleted comment)
trejoytrejoy on January 7th, 2014 02:53 am (UTC)
I second a small si-bell!
elisamba on January 5th, 2014 07:43 am (UTC)
I second the suggestion to read the virgin's guide to cups, it's excellent. http://menstrual-cups.livejournal.com/1243131.html#comments

But I'm not sure how to interpret your message. Is it your daughter who wants a cup? Or you who want her to try a cup? Are you a cup user yourself? Has she tried tampons?

Even being completely convinced about cups, and an adult virgin woman, I had a few painful moments learning to insert it, and panic attacks trying to remove it. I'm not saying it's impossible for a young girl, but the decision has to come from her or else the difficulties of learning could be traumatic.

Cup length is actually very important for a virgin - at one point I was trying to grab a teeny weeny cup off my high cervix, squatting, pushing - never again! If her cervix is high, the small Diva is not too big. But all that is covered in the virgin's guide to cups. :-)
bklynmom on January 5th, 2014 02:22 pm (UTC)
I agree with elisamba, who wants her to use a cup? The answer to that question will go a long way to predicting how she'll manage with the learning curve. I've also got a 12 year old who's a competitive athlete. She hasn't started her period yet and ive been talking to her about her choices. I bought her a meluna pack of small and small mini, pads and tampons. I'm a newish cup fan, but she seems more interested in trying tampons. I used them for years and am fine with her doing so as well. I've already talked to her about needing to change frequently for safety and bought organic ones. I think she needs choices and she'll figure out what's best for her. Hopefully she'll come to see the beauty of cups, but I'm not sure when. As you know, Tweens can be a bit oppositional at times, (LOL) so I don't want to push. Good luck with your daughter, I hope you report back on what works for her, I'll be watching for it!
teacupcake89 on January 5th, 2014 02:59 pm (UTC)
I second something like a small si-bell, small Lunette, small Fleurcup or small Sckooncup is a good beginner friendly option for teens as they have long stems to help with removal.

I'd also strongly suggest using some water based lubricant like KY jelly or coconut oil on herself to help with insertion, as well as using folds that have a narrow insertion point like the 7, triangle, labia or punchdown folds. Youtube video showing the folds here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ep5hh0W-nFw

www.femininewear.co.uk is a good place for purchasing most brands and ships internationally. www.luxurymoon.co.uk/com as well
Not Your Bitchstrand3d on January 5th, 2014 08:50 pm (UTC)
If her periods are light consider sea sponges. Super easy to use and very comfortable. She can even tie string or dental floss around it so it's easier to remove.
elisamba on January 8th, 2014 05:58 am (UTC)
That is a great suggestion, I just wonder whether they would stand up to the rigorous exercise? I hear they can leak if the vaginal muscles squeeze too much.
tarababe87 on January 8th, 2014 08:24 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I have problems with conventional and sea sponge tampons getting squeezed by my vaginal muscles and leaking. I dealt with it for over 10 years before I got a cup.

I have a small MeLuna classic and a sport one. I prefer the sport as it's easier to pop open.
Luceafaraluceafara on January 30th, 2014 05:57 pm (UTC)
What happened in the end? Did she manage to use the diva, or did she get a different one?

I would recommend all the ones already mentioned, and favor Fleurcup, Si-bel and Meluna myself.

Meluna has the widest variety of cup sizes and three different types: soft, classic, sport.
I've never tried the sport ones, but would personally pick a classic over a soft one when exercising to avoid leakage. They are sold by many great places, but also have their European website. The prices you see include 19% sales tax, so if you live outside of the EU, the prices get adjusted during check-out. When I placed my first order through them, I got a few, because they were so inexpensive and I wanted to experiment with different size - I ended up keeping them all, as each one has its advantages:

Meluna.org and click on the Union Jack for English, or:
http://www.meluna.org/epages/63898218.sf/en_GB/?ViewObjectPath=%2FShops%2F63898218

Edited at 2014-01-30 05:58 pm (UTC)
gallifreystandsgallifreystands on February 24th, 2014 09:43 pm (UTC)
Gymnastics is a sport that's all about perseverance- don't let her quit! (I know it isn't your choice but really encourage her not to.) I do trampoline (competitive) use and love a DivaCup, and it is AMAZING for at practice when we can't dash off to the bathroom every five seconds to check for leaks and usually can't got to the lockers to grab fresh tampons. You're on the right track with a cup!

Most cups appear to be very close in size. (The small changes make a big difference in suction, comfort etc but most of the cups do look very similar next to each other.) If it's the 'fear factor' of the size that's an issue, the isn't much to do other than *deep breath* and play with some different folds. (I use the punch down- I'm a teenager and that is just the easiest for me.) There's so many more, though, check them out and let her try out a few.

If you don't mind paying for a second cup, SckoonCup is a lot softer & fairly small too. It might take some fiddling to get open but may be less intimidating overall- plus it comes in lots of colours. Harder to be scared of something when it's a bright and happy colour :-)

It is OK that she's nervous. Encourage her to play with it for a while- squish and fold it randomly. The more comfortable she is with the cup the easier it gets to use!

Good luck!