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22 July 2013 @ 07:40 pm
I'm fifteen and a virgin. A few months ago I bought a MoonCup (size B) not realising how many other options there were out there. However, after several attempts to insert, I think I might be more suited to a softer, smaller cup.

Although I can get one finger into my vagina, I find it hard to get anything else in. I tried looking in a mirror and can see a hole; if I insert my finger, I then still have to fish around before I can find the actual entrance to my vagina. After the original hole I can't see anything so I just have to rely on what I can feel, which obviously I can't do with something like a cup. Is there anything I can do about this?

I also have a bit of trouble holding the MoonCup in a position where it doesn't just flip open and bounce across the room (I've been using the punch-down fold, by the way). Although I can insert my finger without a mirror, with a foreign object I'm completely lost without one, and since I only have two hands, things get tricky. So I'm looking for something soft that I'll be able to fold not much bigger than my finger and with a much smaller rim that the MoonCup.

I've been thinking of a Lunette or a soft Yuuki, but I need something I can get easily in the UK, whether online or in a shop, without people finding out. I'd really like to have a look at all the different options in real life because it's hard to work things out from pictures, but maybe someone could shed some light onto all this?

ginny587ginny587 on July 22nd, 2013 08:25 pm (UTC)
I can't speak much to the cups you've mentioned, as I've only used a Diva, Sckoon and Naturalmama. But as far as getting the cup in without a mirror: keep working with your finger. Pay attention to exactly where you finger is when it goes in without a mirror and what it feels like. Then do the same with the cup. Position it so the fold is down and the smallest part of it is mimicking what your finger does. Eventually, with enough practice, you'll have a better idea of exactly where your entrance is and be able to get the cup in no problem-sometimes it can be a "feel it out" kind of process. I still do a bit of poking with my cup before it hits the entrance-I rarely get it in exactly the right spot the second I try to get it in.
teacupcake89 on July 22nd, 2013 09:04 pm (UTC)
a small si-bell could be a good option to consider as it's nice and soft so will fold up small and has a long thin stem for you to pull on. It's probably a good idea to try and find out how high/low your cervix is on your period before getting another cup just in case you actually need quite a long or short cup. Failing that, trying to use your MCUK and seeing how high it likes to sit after a day or two/overnight will give you a good indication.

as far as not being able to see what you're doing, this is true for everyone and won't change regardless of whether you've had sex/children but getting more familiar with your body and knowing what things feel like inside and outside will help. you don't have to answer this but have you tried masturbating? (not necessarily putting something inside you, but it might help to get to know your body better and often learn how to relax your body/having an orgasm can make inserting a cup much easier as you're already relaxed)

you also don't need to be able to get more than one finger inside right away. I still can't get more than one finger inside no matter how turned on I am, but have leant how to relax to insert and remove a cup. for removal I usually insert one finger alongside the stem and then slowly the other finger so they're both in the space either side of the stem.

use some lubricant like KY jelly (you can get it from Boots or a supermarket near the pregnancy tests and condoms) or unscented coconut oil. you can get big tubs from Holland and Barrets or the supermarket but you can also use it for cooking, as a hair mask/body moisturiser/and a body scrub if you add sugar so that might be a more discrete option as you can say you use it for that if someone finds it. plus you can decant some into a lip balm pot for travelling.

you can put it on yourself and on your finger for getting used to the angle inside etc, and on yourself when trying to use the cup (the cup might fly out of your hand if you put it on the cup!)

it's not a substitute for seeing them in real life but if you haven't already come across this link you can see how other cups look next to your mooncup here:http://menstrualcups.friendhood.net/f52-moderator-s-photo-library

as for buying a cup look no further than www.femininewear.co.uk, very quick delivery and if you email her before placing an order I'm she'll be able to make sure there are no labels on the envelope if that's a worry.

florrieviridis on July 22nd, 2013 09:10 pm (UTC)
Thanks, you helped a lot. I had actually just sent an email to Feminine Wear just before I read your reply, so that was a coincidence.

When I tried to insert my cup today it was just after masturbating so I at least to begin with I was fairly well lubricated, but I'll buy some Coconut Oil or KY Jelly tomorrow and order a new cup too.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on July 23rd, 2013 07:38 pm (UTC)
I wouldn't order a new cup yet. Get through the learning curve with the one that you have now. Your problem isn't the cup, it's your technique and your inexperience with your own body. Once you've gotten the hang of it, then use what you know about your cup, as well as like and dislike about it to figure out whether or not you'd like something different.

In the mean time, read the good advice in the Virgins Guide to Cups (found at the Community FAQ), and the replies to posts tagged "insertion problems."

Don't buy another cup "at random" because you like the name or because reviews say it fits others. Make a wiser choice next time based on what you know, not what you hope it will be.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on January 9th, 2014 03:08 pm (UTC)
If the Mods haven't asked you to do so already, please "edit tags" and remove FAQ from the list. That makes this post show up at the Community FAQ, which should be for general information for everyone, not your personal experiences or questions. THANKS! :o)