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14 October 2012 @ 12:24 pm
I am brand new to menstrual cups and found this site when researching which to purchase.  I ultimately decided to buy a large Fleurcup.  I am 33 and have two kids (both vaginal deliveries.)  I am on day 5 of my first period using the cup.  First, I want to say that I am so happy I chose to buy a cup.  I love the fact that you only have to remove at least once every 12 hours.  I removed more often than this to learn my flow, but I was no where close to overflowing the cup and I have had ZERO leaking issues.  I have not yet had to remove in a public restroom, but don't see that happening often as I am rarely away from home more than 12 hours straight.

So here are my questions...My Fleurcup seems to sit low.  It is not uncomfortable, but I can definitely feel it.  Sometimes it does descend after time where the base is "crowning."  The stem is always sticking out.  So my question is, is this normal?  Or is this the wrong cup for me?  Or am I inserting incorrectly?  I know that I can trim the stem, but I haven't yet because I want to make sure I am not doing something wrong first.  I am not afraid of getting my fingers dirty inserting, but just can't seem to get it any higher.  I have read other posts where others have written that their cervix sits high or low.  Is this something that would affect the placement of the cup?  Would you learn this from your OBGYN or by self discovery?

ElianaOpal: self portraitopal581 on October 14th, 2012 07:48 pm (UTC)
I have a low cervix and my large fleurcup also sits very low. After four cycles I found the stem usually stuck out, and at its highest, the entire stem was just barely inside. So I cut it off. I had meant to cut it sooner but kept forgetting until I was on my period. The stem used to poke at my inner labia (not very comfy) and also poke my husband during sex. Both issues are resolved by cutting off the stem, and I have no removal issues. In short, try it for a while, but if it's sticking out don't be afraid to cut off the stem.
m03m on October 15th, 2012 04:40 pm (UTC)
If the whole stem can be inside your vagina, I would never call your cervix very low. Very low is when the cup itself barely fits inside, or even doesn't.
ElianaOpalopal581 on October 15th, 2012 07:28 pm (UTC)
At some times, my cervix is the right at the entrance to my vagina. At others it is higher. For the most part, when the stem was on my cup, most or all of the stem was sticking out. I have had my cup in for extended periods when I am not on my period (camping for two weeks), and have seen how it fits at most parts of my cycle. The changes can be dramatic - from the bottom of the cup barely being inside to the stem just barely being inside. The original poster's stated issues reminded me of my own so that I felt my tale of stem removal was appropriate. Apologies if this comes across as snarky as it sounds in my head- I just got off a two and a half day shift at work.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on October 14th, 2012 11:58 pm (UTC)
I know exactly what you mean by "crowning" and that can be minimized by getting into a good Kegel exercise routine to strengthen your pelvic floor. But it's not unusual for your cup to sit lower than normal on your low cervix (short vag) days. For me, they're the heavy BLECH days when things are extra sensitive too.

No, you don't need to consult a doctor about it. Despite what the directions say, your cup will ride however high or low it can, depending on the length of your vag on any particular day.

Yes, you're doing everything right. It'll take you a couple of cycles to learn to trust your cup -- and then you can decide whether or not the stem bothers you enough to cut it shorter or lop it off. Personally, I like the fully intact stem on my large Lunette (same dimensions as your Fleurcup) because it gives me confidence as an "anchor," especially because one of my jobs involves a lot of bending, straddling and other unusual movements. But the stem on my other light days cup is completely gone, just barely a nub.

Hang in there. You've got it! :o)
okwaho_okaraokwaho_okara on October 15th, 2012 04:01 am (UTC)
Congrats on getting a cup!! They're the best!! I have a small and large Fluercup. The stem sticks out a bit for me on both. It happens and is normal. As long as you are comfortable and there is no leaking, which you said there isn't, I wouldn't worry about it.
jlmmbe5 on October 15th, 2012 06:36 pm (UTC)
Thank you for all your replies.

kuradi8, thank you for calling me out on my Kegel exercises, or lack thereof. I know I need to do them...and I don't. So if I understand your post correctly, the cup will ride as high or low despite where I put it? So mine will just sit low and I'm not doing anything wrong? If that's the case, I plan to cut off the stem. I don't use it for removal, so is there any reason to keep it?
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on October 15th, 2012 07:27 pm (UTC)
Tee hee, I don't do my Kegels often enough either.

Sorry, I didn't word that well. Yes, despite what the instructions say, the rim will usually sit (O) around your cervix, however high or low it happens to be on that day. And there might be a few days that the cup seems too long and feels like it's trying to escape. Fortunately, your Fleurcup has a nice blunt round base that some say is easier to "cradle" than a pointy-based cup.

As for trimming or removing your stem, just be SURE you want to do it because you can't put it back. As I said, the stem on my Lunette is fully intact and I like it as an "anchor line" to keep it pointed a certain way. But (now that I've put more thought into it...) I suppose it could work against me as well, by not allowing the cup to rock as needed if I needed to bend or stretch into odd positions.
okwaho_okaraokwaho_okara on October 16th, 2012 01:09 am (UTC)
I've trimmed my stem a notch each period until it was perfect for me. I think I have three notches left. I'd keep at least two notches, I find them stem helpful even though I can usually squat, reach in, and pinch the base.