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tempestas_inu
07 August 2012 @ 02:44 pm
If anyone remembers my older post, I was the one who was having trouble inserting a finger into her vagina. After several attempts I decided I'd gotten decent enough at it to at least take the plunge and buy a cup. I ordered a model 1 lunette. It came in a week later. Now I'm trying to do some dry runs and I'm getting stuck. I've read the virgin's guide to cups, among other posts on insertion, multiple times but I'm still having trouble. Using the triangle fold I can get over half of it in, but then I start meeting resistance when the base starts going in and I approach the stem. At this point it starts to hurt and I usually stop. It doesn't help that at that point I can feel my fingers tiring or cramping up by trying to hold the fold in place. I feel like my entrance is kind of weird, like it feels like it goes down, but then curves and becomes more parallel. There's also this firm bump that's near the entrance that sort of feels like it obstructs anything trying to get in, which I can feel with my fingers. Is that my pubic bone?

At this point I'm also wondering how you all manage to insert it all the way without losing your grip and having it pop open with the stem still outside the body. Do the fingers holding the fold in place go into the vigina as well while you insert it?

I'm also wondering about folds. The triangle one is the only one so far I've been able to get most of the cup in with, but I've read many times it's one of the more difficult ones to pop open. Advice?

Oh, and before I forget, one last thing. About my cervix position.... I can't find my cervix. I insert my middle finger about as far as I can and I don't really feel anything. But my middle finger is only about as long as the lunette is with the full stem so I doubt it necessarily means I have a particularly high cervix. How should I go about this?
 
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 8th, 2012 02:27 am (UTC)
the way you keep it folded is really important... http://lockerz.com/s/71359161 i sort of fold it like that, against my thumb, and then when inserting i press it like that against my vulva and slide it in. lol i had to reinsert my cup to see clearly what i actually do.

high cervix basically means unreachable, it's not an exact science. a small lunette isn't an uncommon choice among high cervix folks due to its long stem.

resistance means you need to adjust the angle a bit. the way i describe it to myself is "making the cup come out through the butt hole" :D

see the tricks here http://menstrual-cups.livejournal.com/2618390.html the small lunette is quite soft<3 where have you read that the triangle fold is difficult for popping open? it just may require some manual unfolding, doesn't mean it's a difficult fold. those you can't unfold manually (punchdown) are far more difficult. (i don't need my fingers to be in my vagina while inserting, but i need them for manual unfolding...no big deal really)

dry runs are...dry lol. you've already learned a lot so now try to distract yourself with other things and wait till your period:) my first cup was also a small lunette, and i couldn't get it fully in on dry runs..my first successful insertion was the morning when i was expecting my period, and what i learned during the dry runs was helpful! btw i prefer the labia fold with my small lunette.
Ashatenlegspider on August 8th, 2012 10:29 am (UTC)
Resistance doesn't necessarily mean the angle is wrong, since lube isn't mentioned it could just be friction. I think that needs to be fixed before trying to find the right angle.
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 8th, 2012 12:06 pm (UTC)
well yeah, that's possible. but then this may well be fine when it's not a dry run, so i don't think it makes sense to buy lube.
to me it still sounds more like an angle issue, though. the angle is different for your finger and for a cup. and athough i had read about the angle 34543 times i still forgot about it on my first dry run XD
it's also easier to try out a different angle than to try out lube:D

just read the OP's other posts, someone recommended coconut/olive oil as lube. shockingly for me, it's apparently ok for the vagina, but it coud damage the cup. (can't resist: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090812174342AA6d0Ef ) the lube should be water-based and preferably glycerin-free.
m03m on August 8th, 2012 12:20 pm (UTC)
I don't think coconut oil can damage a cup. As far as I know, silicone cups can be damaged by silicone oil but not other oils.

And I can confirm that coconut oil is indeed excellent as a lube.
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 8th, 2012 01:24 pm (UTC)
i thought whatever's bad for latex is also bad for silicone?
Ashatenlegspider on August 8th, 2012 01:33 pm (UTC)
Not at all, and if you're not convinced by my explanation below I can tell you that my silicone spatula is going strong after years of frying!
Ashatenlegspider on August 8th, 2012 01:29 pm (UTC)
Sorry but you've got the wrong end of the stick on the last point. That link is all about oil damaging latex, which is a well-known issue. Carbon-based oils (basically anything you'd normally think of as oil or fat, whether plant, animal or petroleum derived) react with latex, which is a carbon-based rubber. The same thing happens with silicone rubber and silicone-based oil (ie silicone lube), but it's having that base element in common that matters. Silicone oil doesn't react with latex, which is why it's used in condom-safe lubes, and likewise carbon oil doesn't react with silicone rubber. Cocont oil would damage a Keeper and may not be safe with a MeLuna, but a Lunette will be fine.

Personally I think with basic lube being available so cheaply it doesn't make sense not to buy it, given how much it can improve things. I already had lube around when I got my first cup and found it helpful for the first year because I'm a light bleeder (blood is an awful lube so you need a lot of it to work, and in small quantities it dries up and creates extra friction), but I wish I'd known about it when I started having sex, because it would have saved me a lot of pain and discomfort.
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 8th, 2012 01:40 pm (UTC)
idk, EVERYONE says oil-based lube isn't ok. btw i posted the link because the best answer was hilarious (and admittedly silly)
for me lube was never worth bothering. it might also be an embarrassing thing to buy. much easier to just try a different angle.
m03m on August 8th, 2012 01:57 pm (UTC)
Well, then I guess I'm not part of everyone, and neither is tenlegspider. ;-)

For people who find buying lube embarrassing, coconut oil may be easier since it's also used for cooking and as a hair oil, among other things.
juliiie87juliiie87 on August 8th, 2012 11:22 am (UTC)
I feel like my entrance is kind of weird, like it feels like it goes down, but then curves and becomes more parallel. There's also this firm bump that's near the entrance that sort of feels like it obstructs anything trying to get in, which I can feel with my fingers. Is that my pubic bone?

Yes, more definitely it is. When this happens, take a deep breath, relax, and bear down as if you were having a wee or a bowel movement. This should keep your opening... open. And Try to aim lower. Beginners often think they need to aim upwards, but really, my vagina feels like it curved and ends up somewhere towards my ***hole.

At this point I'm also wondering how you all manage to insert it all the way without losing your grip and having it pop open with the stem still outside the body

Once the rim is pretty much in, I just push/shove the rest in the best I can. Pushing and poking at some specific bits of the fold is actually part of having the cup unfold for me.

Folds : Triangle folds is one that you can sort of unfold manually with one finger, half diamond is the one for me, and labia can also be strategically poked to help it unfold, so they're all good in my opinion. Any fold I use, I always face the folded part towards the floor, it helps tremendously.

High cervix : you don't need to push the cup as far as possible, it'll go there on its own. When removal time comes, just keep relaxed, take your time and... remember to bear down ("poop" the cup within reach).
m03m on August 8th, 2012 12:23 pm (UTC)
I'm also wondering how you all manage to insert it all the way without losing your grip and having it pop open with the stem still outside the body.

I stick the first bit in, then shift my grip slightly, and repeat. The part that's already inside doesn't unfold since the tighter part of the vagina near the entrance won't let it.

My cup has no stem, so that bit doesn't apply to me.
juliiie87juliiie87 on August 8th, 2012 12:44 pm (UTC)
I have a stem, and I don't care about it. In fact, it's probably easier to let the cup pop open as soon as possible, and it's ok if the stem sticks out. If there is space further in the vagina, the cup should go there eventually. Just give it a few kegels, OP.
Serpent: neutralserpent_849 on August 8th, 2012 02:29 pm (UTC)
yeah missed that... i *have to* let it open when most of the cup is outside my body :-)
teacupcake89 on August 12th, 2012 10:49 am (UTC)
about finding your cervix: your cervix might be to one side of the vaginal wall so have a feel around in all the corners not just straight up as cervixes are surprisingly not usually at the 'end' of the vagina! Just like you face isn't at the 'end' of the head the cervix is not at the 'end' of the vagina, if that makes sense? :)

it might feel like the end of your nose, or a small doughnut shaped bump that sticks out/feels different. you might be able to feel a dent in the middle where the blood comes out, and it might feel squishy depending on the point in your cycle.

however, if you manage to get insertion and removal down and are not having any leaks then don't worry about finding your cervix. but it's a good idea to know where it is/will be during a period so you can aim the cup towards it/make sure you don't go past it. if you have a high cervix then it doesn't matter. :)

for insertion: I hold one hand nearer the top of the cup to keep it closed and another holding onto the base/stem. sometimes I need to keep myself open with one hand and then hold the cup with the other: this can be easier to do lying down knees bent and wide apart because you won't have to hold yourself open as much. :)

I personally strongly suggest using some lube or coconut oil/vegetable oil on yourself at least in the beginning. You might find that you don't need it once you get through the learning curve but for me it made a huggge difference in terms of success and feeling comfortable.

Remember that a dry run is usually a lot different to using a cup on a period when there is more natural lubrication and perhaps when you have more motivation to use it! :)

Good luck you CAN do it!!