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13 May 2012 @ 11:10 pm
I've spent at least 12 total hours reading on cups over the past year... I was getting more than tired of pads, and I'm allergic to tampons, so I really wanted to try a cup. I asked people about it, read for hours, and came and asked a question about my dry runs on here two weeks ago (thanks ladies!). I ordered a small ladycup and was so excited. I got the divawash and the milton tablets and figured out what container I could use, etc. I posted on facebook to all my girl friends about this and got their support. I stretched my vaginal opening for two weeks until I could fit two knuckles width. Dry runs were very difficult and internally and externally painful, so I waited for my period.

The night before last, I started my period and got it in no problem. I figured out the best way for me to get it in is the punch-down, pointed to the left, and scooting in to the base. It opens and I push the stem in. No problem. Slight pain when it opened, which scared me more than hurt me the first time, but I nearly couldn't wait until morning to see the results. When I woke up, I leaked after a few minutes of moving around, so I took a shower. It had rode up (high cervix) during the night, so I squatted and bore down. I got the stem, pulled slightly to get it lower, and then got my middle finger in behind it, squeezed to break suction, and pulled it out squished. I couldn't have relaxed more, but it still hurt getting it out. I figured if that was the worst of it, I could deal. Slight pain here and there, what of it?

OMG. Second run was hell. I put it back in when I was in the shower then. Less than two hours later, I had overflowed again. Got back in the shower, and I could NOT get it out. I could reach it, I could break suction, I could pull, but the pain was so much greater and I had to take several breaks and try again. Once I screamed, and then the determination set in and I finally got it out with intense pain though it was as squished as I could manage (How on earth do you get it C-folded while it's in there?? Seemed impossible! I can only get one finger in with it). Peeing since then has hurt. 42 hours later and I'm almost healed. I definitely tore something.

So I'm disappointed at this point. I know I'm in the dreadful learning curve, but it doesn't seem worth it as this point. Changing it every hour on my heavy days? NO. I can't at work.. or school. At this point, I can only get it in laying down, and only get it out squatting to the ground. Get a larger cup? Um.. yea, as a virgin, even with no hymen, that doesn't seem real appealing as I remember the pain of getting a small one out every time (and considering that blood and guts are oozing out as I'm trying to remove this thing, I would think my vaginal opening is as lubricated as it can possibly be and STILL getting the same pain as dry). Longer? Sure. Stiffer? NO. I can still feel the stem when it moves inside me, and it's the softest stem out there. I don't want to be able to feel anything in there. Tampons are sooo incredible uncomfortable, and I don't want anything stiffer than the ladycup. Don't need it - suction and opening is just fine.

The idea of being able to forget about it and not change it as often as pads appealed to me.. but that's not reality here. Saving money isn't worth the pain or mess. Those were my hooks. Now I'm not so thrilled..
Georgiabecomingun on May 14th, 2012 04:34 am (UTC)
I'm a virgin with a low cervix who uses a large ladycup. I cut off the ENTIRE stem, and I put it in while sitting on the toilet. I had a GREAT degree of difficulty learning to put it in because so many people suggested squatting or one leg up or something, and then I tried it sitting over the toilet and it was a world of difference. I do things in a way that I think most people would consider to be less than ideal, but it works for me, maybe it'll work for you?

So my process is:

C fold it, insert only a little, and let it pop open. Then wiggle it up and into place, making sure it seals. To empty, I pinch the bottom and gently pull it forward, and then break the seal when I get it almost all the way out as opposed to breaking the seal right away. I find it's less messy and much easier. In fact, I very rarely have any mess at all.
moonhoney925 on May 14th, 2012 08:11 am (UTC)
That is exactly what I do. Great minds, huh :)
dana_knockoutsdana_knockouts on May 15th, 2012 03:20 am (UTC)
Same here. I have a high cervix so my cup sits really high when it's seated properly.

I have the best success when I don't over think things.
juliiie87juliiie87 on May 14th, 2012 12:24 pm (UTC)
This might not be much help, but have you tried removing while sitting on the toilet ? if you can bear down to bring the cup closer, it might be more comfortable to remove this way, as far as relaxtion and being able to fit fingers goes. I know my ladybits never feel much relaxed when I'm squatting, for some reason. I'm not a virgin, but I can see while it would be difficult this way. And for removing with just one finger, try to slide it up all the way to the rim, press it against the cup and drag the all thing out "hot dog in a bun" style.

I'm not sure I understood correctly, do you want advice on a different cup ? I use a large Cuplee, which is longer in the body, softer, and just a teensy bit wider than your ladycup. Oh and because it's longer and a little wider, it holds considerably more (nearly twice the amount, check the charts). Other than that, Si-Bell is the softest cup, but you may want to compare how it rates to your Ladycup lengthwise and capacity wise. Some user have reported they can remove it just by pulling on the long stem ! on the other hand, the Ladycup is notoriously short and difficult to remove, especially with a high cervix, since it's so slippery. Other than that, a large Meluna soft should be much softer and certainly hold more.

See the pics : http://menstrualcups.friendhood.net/f52-moderator-s-photo-library
charissa080charissa080 on May 14th, 2012 04:18 pm (UTC)
I'm getting my finger up to the rim and squishing, but it's more like a hot dog on a piece of sliced bread. It doesn't fold in. If it did, I may not experience so much pain. I don't know how people get it folded back into a C or punch-down, but they say they do.

YES! Suggestions of other cups are wonderful. I'll check those cups out. It is slippery, but I just dug my thumb nail into the stem and could get it just fine. The pain is what holds me back.
juliiie87juliiie87 on May 14th, 2012 04:35 pm (UTC)
Awh, that must be because the rim of the ladycup is quite a bit firmer than my cup's. Do try a different position though, you might be able to refold using two fingers.
charissa080charissa080 on May 14th, 2012 06:41 pm (UTC)

On another note, I'm looking into CupLee. How did you get yours? The website I found (http://cuplee.com/) doesn't seem too official and I'm not sure I want to transfer money to Russia that way. Amazon doesn't carry.
juliiie87juliiie87 on May 14th, 2012 06:58 pm (UTC)
cuplee.com is their official website. It might look weird, but it's just... russian lol. When I got mine 6 months ago, I had to send 36$ to a russian bank account number I was given. The only problem is I had to pay extra banking fees, and although I got mixed up with the numbers they gave me, they went ahead and sent the cup anyway, and the payment finally cleared. I highly trust their sales representative, Lily, which you can contact directly through Lady-Lee@yandex.ru

Alternatively, I came accross this website : http://shop-wb.com/en/3_cuplee which I immediately asked Lily about, and she confirmed it was a legit reseller. Maybe ask her if their payment methods have been improved since, and determine what would be more convenient for you ? You may want to keep it simple though, because her english does sound like it's coming out of a translator. She's been nothing but kind and helpful to me though. She even sent me pictures of 2 differents shades of color to pick from ! And I love my cup.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on May 14th, 2012 12:29 pm (UTC)
Hang in there! :o)

As for the small Lady Cup, there are many that have the same dimensions and it happens to be the lowest capacity of that bunch. You say you have a high cervix, it's one of a bunch of short cups so as you've discovered, it's a little hard to reach. AND (as if that weren't enough) it's one of the slipperiest cups.

So not only does it fill up quickly, it's hard to reach. And when you do, it's hard to keep a hold of.

Check out how it compares to others at http://sizecharts.livejournal.com/ Unfortunately, the selection of long and narrow cups is lacking. Would the small Diva be too long for you?
charissa080charissa080 on May 14th, 2012 04:27 pm (UTC)
I don't think it would be too long, no. I think it would be too firm. I don't want one with greater suction either, as I've heard the Divacup suction is quite strong.
Sal McGhostface Killahbeuk on May 14th, 2012 05:08 pm (UTC)
It's my understanding that the Diva is a soft cup with a firm rim. And you can soften things up by washing in hot water before inserting. The Diva cup has quite small holes, but those can be widened to make the seal [edit] easier (sorry for the mistype!) to break. I passed a toothpick through the holes several times to open them up.

I use a Diva cup and it has good capacity and it's long and easy to remove because it has grip rings at the base and stem.

Edited at 2012-05-14 05:09 pm (UTC)
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on May 14th, 2012 05:12 pm (UTC)
Suction: http://menstrual-cups.livejournal.com/2091967.html

But that having been said, the Diva's anti-suction holes are relatively small. Some people have greater success with the cup after they have (carefully) enlarged the holes.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on May 14th, 2012 05:22 pm (UTC)
And Melissa rates the Diva http://menstrualcupinfo.wordpress.com/cup-stiffness-comparison-chart/ as a 4 on a scale of 10.
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charissa080charissa080 on May 14th, 2012 11:52 pm (UTC)
Soft as compared to what cups? I'm liking the price and capacity.
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charissa080charissa080 on May 15th, 2012 12:25 am (UTC)
I was just watching that!! :) I like the idea of this one. Thinner rim so it might be easier to get out than my Ladycup, and enough capacity that I wouldn't have to change it every two hours. It's less than half the price of the CupLee. Only other thing I wonder about are those lonely two holes.. is the suction pretty strong when you put it in?
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charissa080charissa080 on May 15th, 2012 02:25 am (UTC)
This! The rim is so stiff and the whole thing is so slippery that it's difficult to break the seal and keep it for removal. Pinching the bottom makes no difference.

I found the cheapest price for the Naturalmama on http://www.femininewear.co.uk/ and ordered it. Thank you!! This blog is a God-send.

Edited at 2012-05-15 02:26 am (UTC)
juliiie87juliiie87 on May 15th, 2012 10:33 am (UTC)
Good choice ! let us know how it goes. :)
fyrejennfyrejenn on May 24th, 2012 06:55 pm (UTC)
I'm sorry you're having problems. When I got my first cup, I was a virgin as well. I remember when it came in the mail, and I opened the package and looked at the cup... all I could think was "this will never work.."
When I finally managed to get it in, I was EXTREMELY disgruntled. Getting it out was a nightmare. But I kept working with it. When that first period was over, my innards were quite sore, and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to use the cup again. But when the next period came around, things just went smoother. I think for a lot of us, the biggest hurdle is simply waiting for that sensitive area to acclimate. But to be sure, it does acclimate.

If you don't already do these things, give them a try:
1)When inserting, let your jaw go slack. This goes a long way toward helping other muscles relax.

2)When trying to pull the cup out, do a kegel - pull in with your vag muscles. The opposing forces break the seal and eliminate the sensation of being eviscerated (if you're experiencing that).

If on some particular day your cup is giving you fits, put it away and use something else. I know it sucks having to use disposables, but that's a sight better than becoming really frustrated with the cup and putting it away for good.

Good luck!