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03 July 2011 @ 12:01 am
Well I was here approximately 28 days ago trying to decide which cup I wanted, and I still don't know!  So I'm back with more information to ask for more opinions.

Backstory: I'm 19 years old, and I'm not a virgin.  After feeling around a lot during my cycle, I realized that my cervix is around 45-50 mm high.  I also think it might be long (my cervix, that is), but I'm not certain.  My flow is such that on my heaviest day, I change pads every 4 hours or so, and on my lightest days, I can use a pad for 8 hours or more with hardly anything on it. 

In the mean time, I bought a box of Insteads today (I'm pretty sure it's the old style, not the newer kind), and I'm really liking the idea of using a cup so far.  It was a little awkward to put in at first, but there was no leakage except when I peed (which is normal, apparently).  There was a problem however: when I did pee, I had the feeling like I didn't empty my bladder all the way.  And no matter how much I tried, I couldn't empty it with the Softcup in.  I guess with a reusable cup, I could just push it up, but Softcups don't push up like that, right?  So I'm maybe leaning towards a softer reusable cup since I'm having that pee problem.  Of course I could always just take the cup out when I pee, but that seems like a hassle.  Especially because I tend to drink a lot of water at work and have to pee four or five times in my 8 hour workday.  And the point of the cup is to avoid a hassle right?

Also, the Softcup JUST BARELY fits behind my pelvic bone, which is supposed to secure it.  Obviously it was secure enough to stay in for the 4 or so hours I had it in today, but at one point, I think it got a little loose because I was able to feel it a lot.  I Kegeled it back up, though, and it was fine.  Does this mean my vagina is narrow?  Should I consider a cup with a smaller diameter?  Maybe 41-43 mm?

So what does everyone think?  Any and all advice is appreciated.  I'm really trying to decide which cup is best for me since I'm a college student and don't have a lot of money to try a bunch of different cups.  I was leaning towards the small Diva last cycle (I was really feeling it for some reason), but I'm worried it will be too long.  I'm also not 100% into Melunas because you can't leave them out in the sun, which is apparently something a lot of you do.  So that's all my info, hopefully you have some advice for me.  Thanks in advance for your help!
Serpent: ihqserpent_849 on July 3rd, 2011 11:12 am (UTC)
yes, sounds like a diva would be too long for you. insteads are much wider than all reusable cups, so i'm not sure the 43 vs 45 mm thing will make a huge difference for you. i'd get a wider cup for a higher capacity. (above the instead are three large ladycups, lotos, lilac and blue)
i've been told that even the supposedly stiff cups like the large lunette are softer than the rim of the instead... but yeah a squishy cup might be a safer choice for you. idk if i linked you to this post yet so yeah i do think unless you need the firmness for a better seal, it never hurts to choose a soft cup.
i'd not rule out melunas just because of this... it's a great way to get rid of stains/smell but it's not something you *need* to do. for my meluna just wearing it and reinserting at normal intervals (wearing for 14+ h is what causes the smell in the first place) is enough, and especially if you sometimes get these bleach-like stains on your underwear, it might work well for you too (that's my theory at least :D bc these stains are caused by normal bacteria that produce hydrogen peroxide... and hydrogen peroxide is also widely used, though i'm not sure whether it's ok to use it with TPE). sunning might also not work for you. and if you get a coloured cup, don't worry about stains before they even appear (plus it's still ok to "air" TPE cups if they're not exposed to sunlight).
to me a far more important factor about melunas is that you're likely to get a light days cup as a free sample:)

also reinsertion becomes far less of a hassle when you're used to it. and if you're going to try insteads more, there's that advice about leaning forwards. (i've got a tilted uterus and leaning back is what works for me).

oh and is your measurement to the tip of your cervix or the furthest you can reach? your cup will also reach as far as you can (unless it's too narrow). regardless of that, i'd say a diva will probably be too long. it also doesn't have the best shape for a 'dangly' cervix. look at the likes of the large meluna, fleurcup or at least miacup/green donna.
Serpentserpent_849 on July 3rd, 2011 12:22 pm (UTC)
oh and melunas are cheaper than others.
amanda132 on July 3rd, 2011 01:06 pm (UTC)
That measurement was to the tip of my cervix. I'll measure to as far as I can reach when I take out the Instead I have in now.

Also thanks SO MUCH for the advice about leaning forward to insert the Instead. I got it in in one clean push! I am LOVING CUPS right now. Even the Instead is amazing. For the first time in years, I woke up on one of the heaviest days of my period and didn't have a mess to take care of. I just pulled out the Softcup, wiped it out, tossed it, and put in a new one. Not one drop of leakage all night! *so happy*
Serpentserpent_849 on July 3rd, 2011 01:08 pm (UTC)
oh good. most cups should fit you then. they don't have to be fully below your cervix.

and lol i read this on lunette's site, for peeing with the cup in :D glad it worked for inserting the instead too:D
amanda132 on July 3rd, 2011 01:24 pm (UTC)
OH lol, I thought you meant leaning forward for putting in the Instead. Well that worked too!
amanda132 on July 3rd, 2011 02:29 pm (UTC)
After some exploring, I'm thinking that the "as far as I can reach" measurement is around 55 or 60 mm. This means my cervix is probably around 10 mm long... that means I should be looking at a cup with a larger capacity, since my cervix will be sitting in the cup, right?
Serpentserpent_849 on July 3rd, 2011 03:27 pm (UTC)
that doesn't sound very dangly really. it will take up some of the capacity but probably not much. but yeah since you have a heavy flow look for higher capacity... i already listed what cups should work for you, you can turn most inside out to shorten them if needed... not the fleurcup, though, but it should be short enough as it is anyway. look at the comparison pics and decide:)
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on July 3rd, 2011 01:24 pm (UTC)
Insteads are to cups like what beer is to wine. Both menstrual products (or alcoholic beverages) but completely different.

Insteads are about 70mm in diameter so that means you can probably wear a "large" (wide) cup comfortably -- so that opens up your choices to an even greater selection.

If you're not sure about length, then aim for a medium length cup instead of one at either extreme.

Or continue to use Insteads since you seem to like them.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on July 3rd, 2011 04:39 pm (UTC)
And it doesn't have to be "either/or" or "forever." It's perfectly OK to mix and match products for different days, day/night, heavy/light or whatever you're in the mood for. It's not a (say this dramatically) COMMITMENT!

As for whether or not you remove a cup/Instead/whatever when you go pee... Once you get the hang of it, it's no big deal to remove and reinsert. It shouldn't become a contest to see how long you can go between empty-ings. The good thing about Insteads and cups is that it doesn't matter how full or not they are because it's not like you're "wasting" a disposable product.

I have used Insteads and I think they're "OK" but I think a (well-fitting) cup is less messy/leaky. With Insteads, I find it easiest to alternate two. Remove one, insert the other and then wash the removed one for re-use later. With cups, they empty more easily and fully. If you don't have a sink or enough paper handy, you can just re-insert it. The few drops that remain won't make any difference. Then wipe/rinse it next time you have the opportunity.
amanda132 on July 3rd, 2011 04:56 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I think I'm definitely going to keep a box of Insteads even when I get a reusable, but I definitely do want to try a reusable once I decide which kind I want. I really want to try the new Insteads too, since they're supposed to fit better/be easier to insert.
Kai: 2Cupskuradi8 on July 3rd, 2011 06:53 pm (UTC)
No rush on the "new" Insteads. I assume they're replacing the old version so they'll be around for a while.

I've been thinking that a large Lady/Color Cup might suit you. They're soft and squishy. They come in pretty colors. They're (close enough to) medium in length. They have a nice capacity. Auction prices (not Buy It Now) on ebay stay quite low sometimes. Take a look and see what you think:

Use Melissa and Afriska's side-by-side photos to compare their size and shape to the other brands.
amanda132 on July 4th, 2011 01:21 pm (UTC)
I'll definitely check them out! Thanks!
dlyjrnldlyjrnl on July 3rd, 2011 04:04 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I can't empty completely with Instead in - or rather, I don't /feel/ like I've completely emptied while it's in. I've taken it out and tried to empty the rest of the way, and nothing comes. I figured for the most part, a trip to the bathroom meant removing the softcup, rinsing out and reinserting when everything was over. Just a few squares of tp resting on my knee so I had somewhere non-dirty to put the softcup til I was done :-)

It took me a lot of practice to figure out how to insert easiest. But the biggest difference was made when I switched (inadvertently, lol) to the newer/smaller rimmed softcups. ALl of a sudden I had NO trouble inserting. It made a huge difference.

I'm doing the same thing as you... waiting, researching, exploring how my body works for awhile first before throwing too much money at it.

When(if) you end up w/ a reusable cup, insteads are still nice to have around for an emergency or when it's time for funtime in bed :-) It made it slightly more uncomfy for my husband, but not a dealbreaker for him (esp. considering it meant having sex when there wouldn't be any w/o the cup) - but, um, it made things AMAZING for me. I think the rim ended up right on the g-spot when it traveled upward while aroused. That's definitely convinced me to keep a box around!
amanda132 on July 3rd, 2011 04:58 pm (UTC)
I think that's the same with me. I don't feel like my bladder is empty, even if it is. I definitely want to try the smaller rimmed cups, but both stores I went to only had the old style.

I'm definitely going to keep a box of Insteads around for sex, but as of right now, I don't think I'm comfortable enough using them to have sex with one in. Once I get the hang of it, I'll have to convince my boyfriend to try it out!
fragment_aeriefragment_aerie on July 4th, 2011 03:40 am (UTC)
I could barely hook Insteads behind my pubic bone, and my "Goldilocks" cup is a large Lunette. Insteads, to me, are kind of huge.
amanda132 on July 4th, 2011 01:22 pm (UTC)
Okay, cool! They are huge, right? The more I use them, the more I want a resuable cup that fits me more naturally.
fragment_aeriefragment_aerie on July 4th, 2011 07:51 pm (UTC)
Insteads, I was always at least aware of-they were always just the tiniest bit uncomfortable. I stop being aware of my Lunettes a few minutes after insertion.