?
02 September 2009 @ 10:43 pm
Hey everyone!
I am 17 and i tried using my diva cup for the first time tonight. I was really excited to use it, cuz i'm kinda a environmentalist and i love the idea of not throwing out any tampons or pads.
But I tried putting it in and it just wouldn't go in. it hurt SO MUCH! I am a virgin, so things don't go in there on a regular basis. But I have no problems with tampons at all.
The cup keeps popping open before it goes in, and so I just try and keep shoving it in there, but the pain is too much. even if I get it somewhere up there, I can't deal with it, I can't even move it hurts so much. Am I doing something wrong? Please don't tell me I'm to small to use the cup. I really want to use it.
I've tried to put it in probably around 15 times now, and have had no luck what so ever.
So Please any suggestions??
And I have tried relaxing my muscles

 
banana rhubarbbuddy_friend on September 3rd, 2009 03:43 am (UTC)
are you on your period currently? if not i would suggest waiting until you are it might make it way easier. if you are on your period though then i would suggest using a little lube and trying different folds to get it in. hope that helps!
calli09 on September 3rd, 2009 04:12 am (UTC)
First, I wouldn't force it. I took time to read through a lot of the threads here on insertion and the folds. If had not been for this community, I would not have stuck with making a cup work.

I started out with a Diva cup (but since I am petite and a virgin also), it was too large and painful. I ordered the smallest cup I could find after reading a lot of posts on here (the small Ladycup).

Once it came in, I trimmed the stim and flipped it inside out. I also used the lubrication they included to test different folds. I found that the 7 fold was the easiest to gently insert for it then to pop open. After rotating, it was sealed sufficiently.

Here's a great post on folds: http://community.livejournal.com/menstrual_cups/453392.html

Insertion should not be painful - take your time and read through a lot of the threads, and I think you'll find some useful advice like I did.
Michellepinkdagger on September 3rd, 2009 04:25 am (UTC)
You've already tried 15 times tonight? If so, stop. I think it's easier said than done with muscle relaxation - you could be tensing up without even realizing it or meaning to. The more you try, the more frustrated you get, the more pain and discomfort you will encounter and the more sore you will end up.

I recommend a different fold from the one in the pamphlet. In the link calli09 posted, I think either the punch down or origami folds are easiest and smallest and most successful for me. If you're not on your period and don't have a water-based lube to coat the cup with for easier insertion, masturbation can produce lubrication and promote relaxation. Also try different positions - standing, squatting, sitting, lying down, legs in different positions, etc.

Take your time and don't rush it. Keep in mind that in a survey on this community, the vast majority of cup users required at least one full cycle - not one day, not one week, but one cycle - to get the hang of cup use.
Miakatimamiakatima on September 3rd, 2009 04:35 am (UTC)
i agree with everything said so far. if you're not on your period (or just barely started) get some water-based lube to help. if you're sore, STOP and take a break. generally your vaj won't start feeling better until you stop poking it. ^_^

i use the punch down fold. the fold in my diva cup manual didn't work for me at all and i kinda despaired that it would ever go in. after you've taken a break try some different folds and go slowly. very few women are able to get used to the cup on their first try!
wernotalonewernotalone on September 3rd, 2009 05:42 am (UTC)
I agree, take a break. I get irritated if I put it in and pull it out more than 3 times in a day.

I also recommend the 7 fold.

It really takes a lot of time to learn to really learn to relax those muscles, especially if you aren't used to masterbating or exploring the area on a regular basis.
elizabby: ACup iconelizabby on September 3rd, 2009 08:16 am (UTC)
I'm a punch-down user myself, so it just goes to show that everyone is a bit different! My top tips:.
- if you don't have/use lube, run the cup under some water to make it slicker, especially if this is a "dry run" and you are not on your period.
- sit down to help relax, on the edge of the bath or on the toilet.
- spread your knees as wide as you can comfortably manage.
- "tuck your tail under" or push your hips forward a bit, as this makes the most of your internal space.
- use your favourite fold, and try a few different ones. Hold the cup in your dominant hand (most people use their right)
- with your other hand, spread your labia so you don't pinch anything, or get any hairs in the way.
- Don't push harder, push SLOWER. Take deep breaths and give yourself time to let the tissues get used to the idea that something is going in...
- Insert parallel to the floor, or push towards your tailbone NOT your belly button. Most newbies tend to push too "high". Lean back a bit if you need to.
- Once you feel the cup pass through the "narrowest point" (that's behind your pubic bone) let go the fold and let the cup slide IN. If it slides OUT you let go too early and it wasn't in far enough.
- Swirl your finger around to check for opening and position. Do a few Kegels if you have doubts - stand up and move around and let the cup find its own level.

Hope this helps some - good luck! Be patient and kind to yourself - it takes time and practice but is SO worth it!
Kai: pic#84732488kuradi8 on September 3rd, 2009 10:11 am (UTC)
Check out the questions and answers under the Virginity tag. There's LOTS of good advice in there.

To learn how to isolate your muscles, next time you go pee, start and stop your stream a few times. You use your PC muscles to do that. Then insert your finger and give it a little squeeze using the same muscles. Now that you know how to tighten them, practice relaxing them. You'll need to relax them for insertion and especially for removal.

It's also possible that your hymen is in the way. Some gals can stretch it, others can't. It's possible that cup usage can break it, so decide for yourself whether or not keeping it intact is important to you.
Dina Clare: dreamlintilla on September 3rd, 2009 10:51 am (UTC)
This post in particular. :)
crochetaduckcrochetaduck on September 3rd, 2009 10:54 am (UTC)
Which fold are you using? The triangle fold is the only one that I can get to stay folded until the cup is all the way in.
khendrix85khendrix85 on September 3rd, 2009 01:00 pm (UTC)
1. LUBE

2. RELAX

3. PATIENCE

4. FOLDING TECHNIQUE
khendrix85khendrix85 on September 3rd, 2009 01:02 pm (UTC)
if you dont have lube, use vaseline. i'm sure there is some laying around.

sit on the toilet, legs spread. relax relax relax.

a good folding technique is the punch down. it is super easy ane makes the cup pointed.
fireaphidfireaphid on September 3rd, 2009 05:36 pm (UTC)
Vaseline isn't exactly the best idea. Oils like vaseline are very hard for the vagina's self-cleaning system to remove from the body, so it could lead to infection. You can buy a water-based lube at any drugstore if you need it.
khendrix85khendrix85 on September 3rd, 2009 06:22 pm (UTC)
yes. good point. i should have added that using vaseline regularly isn't recommended.... but.... as a one time only thing, i'm sure you'll be okay and your cup won't explode. :)
Abbyahava57 on September 3rd, 2009 01:10 pm (UTC)
Instead of doing it sitting on the toilet, you might try it standing up with one foot on the toilet seat/other elevated surface. And get some lube- helps a lottt
Baby Bloodheartbabybloodheart on September 3rd, 2009 06:57 pm (UTC)
Like with anything new it takes time to get use to the cup, I find a big issue a lot of women have is when it comes to size - know that there is no such thing as being 'too small' as your vagina naturally stretches, it's made to allow a babies head through so a cup is no bother, also know that when folded cups aren't much bigger than tampons, when open cups aren't much bigger than expanded tampons.

A few things to make insertion easier;

- Consider a smaller cup, Divacup is a large cup so generally I don't recommend it to younger women, a brand like Ladycup where even the larger sizes are much smaller than other brands so a small sized Ladycup is tiny next to a Divacup.

- Try inserting/removing in the shower or bath, the water helps lubricate and baths/showers can help you relax, but for me I think the biggest plus to doing this is that you don't have to worry about possible mess if something goes wrong when inserting the cup.

- Insert during heavy flow as this makes insertion easier, you can also use lubrication such as KY jelly or even olive oil if you don't want to go to the store or ask your parents to buy you lubricant, but never use baby oil or vaseline.

- Masturbate, as when aroused your vagina relaxes, enlargens opens and lubricates, this is natures way of preparing for penetration so can help with inserting menstrual cups too.

- Take your cup and practice using your closed fist to represent your vagina, it may help you better see how the cup is going to be inserted into your vagina. Just make sure you clean your hands and your cup before inserting it into your vagina for real.

- Relax, is obviously a big one to think about, it may be that you think you're relaxed but you're stressing so much about inserting the cup that you don't notice you;re tensing up - know that cups last up to 10 years, so you have LOTS of time to practice using the cup! Also know that trying to force it or trying to insert it again and again and again is more likely to leave you sore and frustrated.

- Look through all the tags, it may be that you know a lot about menstrual cups already, but it may only take a small comment from someone somewhere and you'll have a 'eureka' moment where suddenly all seems clear and you know how to use the cup. Look at different folding methods, sometimes just the one that is recommended in instructions will work fine for you, but if not try different folding methods - also know that we all have our own little ways of inserting and keeping the cup closed until it is inserted (I fold my cup once then use my thumb to push the cup up the back wall of my vagina - doesn't pop open that way).
lmls10 on September 3rd, 2009 08:31 pm (UTC)
Thanks guys! I'll try it again, with some of ur point. and yes i was on my period so it wasn't a dry run... but i'll try relaxing more and some folding techniques:)