qtfaces (qtfaces) wrote in menstrual_cups,
qtfaces
qtfaces
menstrual_cups

NEED help for my daughter

Hi, All,

I am having some issues with my daughter using her cup.  Back in October we both purchased the Lunette cups (size small for her and size large for me).  Personally, I LOVE my cup.  It did take me a few months to really get the hang of it, but once I figured it out I was all set.  Now that I have figured it out I wouldn't give it up for anything (well, maybe a BETTER cup, but . . . . ).

Anyway, I have addressed some of the issues about my daughter before.  She has a VERY heavy flow that lasts for as many as 18 days and she was easily using 100-150 tampons a month and about 30 pads a month too.  This was one of the main reasons why I wanted to switch her over to using a cup - the cost of the tampons & pads was killing us!  Over time though, her periods flow has been not as heavy and the number of days has decreased, so that is getting better, but it is still very heavy and about 2 weeks of bleeding.

Well, when the cups first arrived, she was apprehensive about using it.  I gave her printouts from online that she could refer to, I gave her the instructions that came with the cup, I gave her website addresses that she could browse for help, and I encouraged her to come to me to ask anything that she wanted to ask.

The first new period after the cup arrived she did try it out.  After the first day at school she said that she thought she was going to love it, because she had been able to go all morning until lunch without having to rush to the bathroom every hour to change a pad/tampon all morning, and she was then able to go all afternoon after lunch until she got home without a change.  However, that night was a totally different story.  She leaked overnight and completely flooded her bed, not to mention the mess on her pajamas and herself.  She was FURIOUS!

She went back to using tampons and pads for the rest of that month.  She then continued to use tampons and pads every month thereafter until they ran out this week.

Yesterday she sent me an email explaining that she HATED the cup, that she thought it was great that I was able to use mine with success but that she had failed at it , and that she thought it was unfair that I was not going to be purchasing tampons and/or pads for her because she had a cup now, and on and on and on she went.  She said that every month she would only use the cup for about 1/2 a day at the beginning, but that she didn't like the way it felt, and she just didn't feel like she could "get the hang of using it."

When I finally got the chance to sit down with her and discuss the issue of the cup, she explained that when she used the cup it felt "like a balloon was hanging out of her vagina" and that it didn't matter how hard she tried to push it up inside her she just couldn't get it up there any higher.  She also said that she has "never been able to get the cup to spin or rotate while inside" so she's not 100% sure that her cervix is inside the cup.  However, she said she is assuming that it is, because it doesn't leak, just that she did NOT like the uncomfortable way the bottom of the cup stuck out of her vaginal opening.  I had this problem myself, but after a few months of just not giving up I was able to get it higher without problems.  I just had to be persistent and keep trying.

Furthermore, she said she has tried EVERY fold that she has been able to find online, in forums, in chats, etc. and has not found one that will allow the cup to be positioned any higher in her body before it pops open and just stays where it popped.

My questions are these:

Is there any other cup that might help with the popping open issues?  I know that the Lunette cup is of a rather firm type of silicone that doesn't have a lot of give.  It did take me several months of using my cup everyday of my period to finally be able to figure out the right fold for me and the right way to hold it to get it inserted high enough before popping open.  I just don't know if another brand of cup would be better, and I would hate to spend the money for her to use the cup ONE time and refuse to use it.

Would a different SIZE cup help?  I'm really not sure what to suggest for her.

What other suggestions can I give her to help?  I did explain that she just can't give up immediately.  I thought that she should at least keep trying, but she is very resistant (being a teenager and all).  Mainly, she just thinks it is unfair to expect her to try and like something just because I do.  Even though I have explained that I didn't LOVE my cup right away - it took me months of continual use and practice and tweaking to get it figured out and "just right" - she doesn't seem to care.  However, I just don't think I can afford to continue providing her with 100 tampons and 28 pads a month!  The cost is insane!  Her flow has lessened over the passed several months, but it is still heavy and long - just not AS heavy and long as it was 6 months ago.  I am hoping that over time it will become less and less (both in heaviness and length of days).

Thanks in advance for any help you can extend on this.

EDIT:  Seeing that SO many of the replies have asked if my daughter has seen a doctor, I thought I would edit my post.  YES!  She has seen a doctor.  My daughter is currently 16 (turned 16 in February).  She started her first period in August 2007.  I didn't think much of the issue of the heavy flow and the length of the period at first, but after she had been consistenly having her period for about 5 months and they were ALL very heavy and long, we visited with her doctor.  He has monitored her cycles since.  We have chosen not to use hormonal therapies to resolve this issue, but we have noticed that over time the periods have been less heavy and not as long each month.  We are waiting for another year before we decide to do anything hormonal to help.
Tags: brand comparisons, heavy blood flow, lunette, pads - disposable, sizes/size issues, tampons
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