? ?
Let me preface this with the fact that I am a 16 year old virgin, in case it matters. I also can't find my cervix ever, and I'm not quite clear on how to tell if I've gotten the cup past my pubic bone. I've really tried to figure both out, I swear. Anyway, I ordered a Lunette last week thanks to this wonderful community. I was really excited to get to use it. I am completely dedicated to figuring out how to get this to work.

It was pretty difficult to get it in at all, really. I tried a lot of folds, but none of them would go in at all until the seven fold. The seven fold wouldn't unfold. I've been trying at it so long that I've listened to half of an old James Bond movie from the bathroom and I believe a few pieces of my hymen became victim to my Lunette (which I don't really mind, in fact, I think it will make it easier). I think I did get it to pop open once, but it didn't seem like it was fully open. When I tried to get it out, it definitely had some sort of suction, though.

Could someone help me figure out a fold that will pop open easily and not murder my nether bits? I think the origami might do the trick but I can't understand how to do it (it seems like the Lunette is too stiff to do it as it's done in the guide with all of the folds and it always pops open too early for me). If you recommend the origami fold, could you give me more in-depth instructions, as I can't seem to get it right?

elizabbyelizabby on February 13th, 2009 11:08 am (UTC)
I think you are right - the Lunette is too stiff for the origami fold to work well. I use either the punch-down or the seven fold - both work well for me. The punch-down is narrower and easier to insert, but harder to pop open. The seven fold is the reverse.

If you've ever used a tampon, you know that you have to insert it slowly with steady pressure towards your tailbone (parallel to the floor). Don't push too high towards your belly button. Once it goes past your pubic bone it will probably slide in and pop on its own. A few Kegels will help it sit right.

The trickiest part I found at the start was making sure it is fully popped open. One pop doesn't mean it has popped all the way! The bottom of the cup should feel smooth and round. If you can dent it, it is not fully open. I can spin the cup in place by swirling my finger around, but not everyone does this.

If in doubt, give it a push further in - I find that when I'm wearing my cup in the right position it is quite high up - I can't feel it at all and the untrimmed stem sits just behind my pubic bone (the narrowest part of me).

Good luck! It takes practise and getting to know your body. If you have never done this, take the time to put one or two fingers in and wiggle around a bit to find out where you are narrow and hard - you should be able to find your pubic bone (at the front).
elizabbyelizabby on February 13th, 2009 11:12 am (UTC)
Two other comments: I usually wet my cup for insertion but don't use any other lubricant.

It will be easier when you actually have your period.

Give yourself time. I took three full cycles to be really comfortable with the cup, but it was SOOO worth the effort to figure it out! Now I just "pop and go"! ;)
fireaphidfireaphid on February 13th, 2009 02:51 pm (UTC)
I'm also a virgin with a small Lunette, and the only fold I can get to work at all is the triangle (extreme seven): you flatten the cup, take one corner of the rim and fold it all the way to the base of the cup (where the stem attaches), and then hold it there with your thumb and forefinger; the other corner of the rim should now be a tiny point. I think it's easier to insert it with the opened part of the fold going down. If it makes you feel better, I also have trouble holding the origami fold with the small Lunette. . . maybe the cup is too stiff for that fold?

I'd recommend quitting for an hour or two to relax and then trying again. The first two times I tried to use my cup, I'd start tensing up after a few failures, so, rather than hurt myself trying and souring my cup experience, I took a break (of a few hours) before trying again. Is this a dry run? Because dry runs are notorious for being trickier than the real thing. Either way, the addition of a water-based lube might help it open a little better, and you can make sure you've got the angle right by using your fingers first.

Anyway, if you think you've got it open, try "stirring" around the rim to check for dents and doing kegels, as wishuponakate said. In my experience, when it's not quite open, it will open up fully if you leave it alone for a little while instead of taking it out right away. (I made the same mistake when I inserted my cup for the first time, but now I just kegel to make sure it opens.) And it is possible to have suction when the cup is hardly open at all. . . I'm not sure how, but mine re-suctions when I try to remove it, so I have to keep breaking the seal whenever I take it out. Anyway, I hope this helps!
Angela, the not-so-teenaged dementor: Alice - Curiousercrazykitties03 on February 13th, 2009 03:27 pm (UTC)
I rarely feel my Lunette pop open. Once I push it past my pubic bone (pushing more towards my back than upwards), it seems to just unfold itself, but I don't feel it pop.

I'm definetaly not 16 though. I'm twice your age. I have to say that I'm so jealous of all the money you are going to save on disposables!

When I'm inserting my Lunette, I think of my pubic bone as the opening to a cave. Once I get past that, there is extra room for the cup to open. I use the punch down fold, but if the seven fold is how you need to fold it to get it inserted, then that is what you should use. I've never had problems with the Lunette not opening. Once it is in past the pubic bone, I grasp the base (not the stem) and turn it a few times. If it wasn't open before that, it is after that. I sometimes still have dents in the bottom. If I feel a dent, I just keep feeling a little higher up to make sure the cup is open above that and as long as it is, I don't worry about a little dent. I have not had a leak except for the second time I used my cup and one time I left it in over 12 hours.

As others have said, the most important thing is to relax and take your time. You are far from alone in having difficulties at first. It does get better. When I think about the first couple times I tried to remove the darn thing, it brings tears to my eyes. I actually thought about trying to cut my cup to break the suction! Thankfully, the thought of having to have my nether regions stitched up kept me from trying that! I wish I had more specific advice for you, but everyone is different and there are some things that you just get from doing them. Please though, take your time and if it is hurting or you are getting frustrated, take a break. This is nothing to stress out over (I did). After a couple of successes (and it will happen), you'll wonder how you even had problems.
nickelshoenickelshoe on February 13th, 2009 03:51 pm (UTC)
For me, the key to insertion is body position. If I lean forward at all, I hit what seems to be a dead end just a little ways into my vagina. I know it's longer than that, but no amount of wiggling, lube, or even arousal, seems to do the trick when my vagina is bent out of shape from leaning forward. I have to, have to, have to, lean back. It works easiest if I sit on the floor with my knees up, but is less messy if I just lean back on the toilet. This seems to get my vagina in a nice straight line, so the cup can get in all the way.

It also helps me sometimes to insert a finger, so I can feel which direction my vagina goes. If you don't have much experience with your vagina (I don't know if you've used tampons or done much exploring), I highly recommend at least checking out which direction to aim for. Your vagina might angle more downward than you expect (or left, right, up, who knows). And, I emphasize, the angle changes based on how your body is positioned, so it doesn't hurt to check.

Your body might be shaped differently from mine, so if leaning back doesn't work for you, try other positions.
Kai: pic#78985186kuradi8 on February 13th, 2009 04:01 pm (UTC)
I also wish I'd found cups when I was your age. And the Lunette is a great cup.

Check out the video at Ignore the copious amounts of sales hype and their insertion instructions (completely different product) but pay attention to the animation and the clear anatomical cutaway. Note the location of the pubic bone and the cervix. Then IGNORE the instructions that came with your Lunette because they are completely out of scale. They make it seem as if your cup is the size of a thimble and your vagina is several miles long. In fact, your cup will rest against your pubic bone and your cervix will probably settle into (O) the opening.

The Origami fold looks like the folded part would be on the side if inserted on edge. That's why I prefer the Punch-Down fold -- because the punched part faces down (or up, but I prefer down -- it makes a difference) on insertion.

Want to try my method?
Using the Punch-Down fold, face the punched part down and hold it with your thumb and middle finger. That leaves your forefinger free to insert with the cup to provide an air passageway to fill the cup and to feel it pop open. Insert the cup most of the way so that the rim is beyond your pubic bone and allow it to open fully there. Then nudge the stem a little rearward so the opening of your cup points toward your cervix and give it a boost as you Kegel the cup up and into place.

That is to tighten your PC (pubococcygeus) (aka pelvic floor) muscles. Next time you go pee, start and stop your stream a few times. You use your PC muscles to do so. Then insert your finger into your vagina and give it a little squeeze. Yep, your PC muscles again. You need to relax them fully for insertion and removal and tighten them to boost the cup into place.

It's not nearly as complicated as my overly detailed instructions make it seem.

Good luck and "we're here for ya" if you have any more questions.
Circus Girlsandundershoes on February 14th, 2009 12:03 am (UTC)
Everyone's given you some great advice, but no one's quite offered suggestions for how to figure out if your cup is past your pubic bone. First, can you feel with your finger where your pubic bone is, from inside? Can you easily aim for/get a finger into your vaginal opening? I ask, because when I first tried using a cup, I was 17, a virgin, and I'd never used tampons or masturbating by putting anything inside me (external clitoral stimulation did the trick quite handily!). Totally disregard this if you have already got your vagina kind of figured out, but if not, try figuring out where stuff is with your fingers. I'll try and explain how I eventually did it.

Make sure you're relaxed, sitting in a comfortable chair or reclining on your bed or something like that. Find your pubic bone from the outside, and trace your fingers down between your labia until you find the spot that gives the most. Here's the part that confused me, when I was first trying to use my cup, insert NuvaRing, and have PIV sex (these were all happening within the same few months): even though I knew that I needed to sort of angle backwards toward my belly button, I didn't realize the vagina wasn't really straight, but rather, I needed to sort of crook my fingers up underneath my pubic bone to get in.

When you find that spot that gives, don't try to just push against it. For me, it's easiest to get a finger into my vagina if I pretty much lay it flat between my labia, and slide down, curving the tip upwards and into my body when I reach my vagina (which will be that point where you suddenly don't feel bone anymore). As you crook your finger up into yourself, that bone your finger is around is your pubic bone. The cup's rim needs to get past that ridge to be able to open all the way.

Man, that was really hard to describe, so I have no idea if it will be helpful. Let me know if there's anything that makes no sense to you.
Circus Girlsandundershoes on February 14th, 2009 12:05 am (UTC)
annnd that should be masturbatED rather than ING.
maid_of_milomaid_of_milo on February 14th, 2009 01:12 am (UTC)
I use the origami fold with both my large and small lunette as do my two flatmates with their lunettes. For me the origami pops just right (I think it has something to do with how the folds in it unfurl?) and I find it easier for insertion as it has a small tip and less bulk at the end than punchdown (I've tried all the folds for a bit of variety and always come back to the origami). I just do the fold as described on this comm. The trick, for me at least, is to insert with the folded side up, pushing in/holding the bulkiest part in with my thumb. I have my middle finger flat along the underside, with my fingertip about halfway down the back which ends up being the perfect spot for the pressure of it to push again the thumb on top. Seems to work best for me when I line my stem up flat against the middle finger holding the underside too. I have tried the labial fold as well which was almost as good as the origami for insertion actually (I just found it didn't pop as well for me, had to tweak it when with origami I never have to tweak at all), so maybe you could give that one a go if you just have no joy with trying the origami? I just bought a selene and have noticed it's a bit stiffer than my 15mth-old clears so I think they must soften up over time with use/folding. When I first got a cup I just sat there and practiced the fold and I think maybe that helps them become more malleable when you go to actually use them too? Oh and for ref, I'm a virgin and I just wet the rim with water before folding if need any lubrication (usually being on period is enough but for lighter days I tend to need the water). Hang in there, it's just practice, practice, practice. When I was starting out and stressing about removal or anything I would just force myself to put on the biggest smile I could from ear to ear - you just can't stay tense with a giant goofy grin on your face, ha :-)